Content Warnings:
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Facade
Lying in bed, slightly awake, I felt a shudder go through the old wooden house. A constant and squeaky shudder at that. It seemed to reverberate throughout the house. Staggering out to the loungeroom, Steve was mindlessly flicking between channels before finally settling on music clips.Implied sex
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Facade
Not even diverting his gaze from the screen he piped up, “Tyson, chuck us a beer dude”
Mindlessly I made my way to the kitchen, threw him a beer and grabbed the carton of orange juice for myself. “I don’t know how you’re drinking at eight in the morning, although, I’m guessing it has something to do with Robson’s new chick though,” I quizzed my housemate.
A groan reverberated through the house.
“Yeah,” he said heavily before taking a swig, “You’re at the other end of the house, you don’t have to listen to that all night. I don’t think they’ve surfaced for air yet.”
“And what about those times you’ve turned up with some guy and we’ve had to listen to you both through the night?” I countered. Robson may have only been here a fortnight, but I was willing to give the fellow a chance. Even if he did was studying a Communications degree.
He gave me a bit of a glare before changing channels again, “That’s different, I don’t go and flaunt it all over the house, he’s practically been doing it everywhere. I’d put money he’s gone at it on your bed while you were out at work.”
“Quiet! He’ll hear us!” I hissed at Steve as he turned up the television, “Besides, I have a lock on my door. At worst, they’ve probably been all over that futon you’re lying on”
Giving a sickened look he scrambled onto the floor, “Bastard.”
A while later, the trembling ended and Robson came out to the loungeroom in nothing but his boxers, “Yo, porn star, what’s shaking?” asked Steve, trying not to crack up as Robson laid down on the futon.
“Not much, not much, Em’s just sleeping” he said lazily.
A smile crept across my face as well, “So…. Big night in I take it?”
Still Robson was oblivious, clearing his throat, “Not really, quiet really, apart from drunko here staggering in at 11 and singing his heart out”
Finally, Steve cracked, he just started laughing, and of course I joined in too, “Dude, we totally could hear you going at it like all night. All the oohs and aaahs!” In between breathless laughing Robson’s pale face got redder as we continued.
“Fuckers. You’re just jealous you don’t have a girlfriend” he spat, getting up to the kitchen to make himself breakfast.
That comment wasn’t exactly fair, I’d just dumped Jasmin, I didn’t want another chick at the moment, but Steve was quick on the draw today, “Dude, I don’t want a chick, remember!” He collapsed into hysterics as I noticed the time. 10:30, I was supposed to be going with Karyn to get some paint for her room. She still lived at home with her parents, they were okay people. A bit far out in the suburbs, and with petrol at the prices it is now, at least a 20 buck trip in my ute.
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“So, Red Terra for a feature wall and Mill Flower?” asked Karyn, fiddling with her sunglasses as we stood in the paint store.
After about twenty minutes here, I was SMSing my mates and trying to pay attention to colour cards “Karyn, I’m a builder, not a designer. You want those Tv people. Or your chick friends, they know about colours. Or Steve,” I tried futilly.
Grabbing another colour card, she didn’t look particularly happy with that suggestion. “Yeah, well I used to date Steve, ya’know and he’s not that good with colour.” She pulled out some more swatches, “Besides, you’re going to be painting this room with me, and I thought it’d be fun to involve you in the whole process!”
Mark from work sent me back a message, (C what matches w/ this!) along with what looked like a picture from one of his porno mags. He was a bit weird, on site he’d disappear into the port-a-loos for a while, and the rest of us always knew he was up to no good. Of course, at this moment Karyn leant over my phone and took a great look at the message.
“Still the same as in high school, aren’t you.” She sighed and began muttering under her breath, “Who’s that from?”
“Come on Karyn, I didn’t send that message, my boss did, I need to keep him on-side so hopefully I can get a good pay increase after I finish my 2nd year of this apprenticeship, ” I tried to explain. But she wasn’t having a bar of it.
Karyn had a calm anger about her, “Still the same.” She spat, picking out a handful more of colours, “You were sending all those pictures back in high school. In math we’d just watch you boys all share your porn, seriously, with us girls sitting five meters away, ignoring us. I don’t know why I’m still friends with you, I really don’t,” She ranted, oblivious to the world, or the older couple who were starting at her in disbelief.
The sixteen year old who looked to be in charge of the store wandered over with his oversized sneakers and baggy shirt, “Need any help? ‘Cause we can’t have any domestic abuse in store”
“We’re not dating mate. And we’re fine” I said, trying to fob him off. But yeah, why was I friends with Karyn? We hadn’t really hung out at school, I’d only known her when she dated Steve. Before he got all gay and stuff. I dunno, Karyn was cool to hang out with, but when she got like this, she was really annoying.
Karyn put her sunglasses back and turned towards the guy who was heading back to the counter, “Yes, we are fine. But I want a two litre of Lean Lemon and a one litre of Bashful Purple thanks.” She declared, handing over the swatches very hastily.
I looked over the colours and grabbed a booklet to look at later. The place we were renting was looking a bit scabby, I figured if we offered to paint the place for free, the real estate company would cough up for the paint. The guys and I could get it knocked over in a week perhaps. If we did it pretty well, hopefully they’d extend the three month lease to a year.
I was getting pretty sick of Karyn actually, taking the moral high horse. Like it was my fault I got sent pervy SMSes. She was a cool chick when we hit the valley, but when she was snappy, she was an absolute bitch. But, still, I’d agreed to help her today so that’s what I’d do.
“Got all the masking tape, brushes, rollers and the rest of that stuff?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood.
“Actually, no, I needed some more of that masking tape, the special blue one. My dad says it won’t tear off paint,” she said, grabbing a roll from my hand.
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When we were dropping off the painting equipment at Karyn’s place, Steve rang me, asking if we wanted to go out tonight. I didn’t have any other plans so Karyn got ready and we headed home. Steve was already all ready in a rather tight sleeveless shirt, very tight jeans and a fair bit of hair gel. Not to mention a large drink in hand.
“Hey Steve…Are you wearing eye-liner?” asked Karyn as she walked in, adjusting her top.
Steven moved quickly to the nearest mirror, yet kept his beer steady, “How could you tell!? It doesn’t look TOO gay, does it?”
Laughing at his paranoia I quickly ducked into the shower, “Mate, on the gay-o-metre you’re Supergay.”
I could hear them still in the loungeroom as the water cascaded down, “Oh shut up Tyson! Come on, you have to drink with me, I’ve been here all afternoon and Robson and Suzie have been at it like rabbits. Again” he moaned.
“And I bet it was just you wishing you could be at it like a rabbit, eh Steve. Look at those arms though! ”
“You forgot the tan! Oh, you know me too well Karyn! Love the new brunette look, very in. Now, lovely mauve top with the stitching and detail there, where did you get it? It fits you really well, shows off the twins!”
“That new boutique, on Elizabeth Arcade, it goes with these jeans and shoes, don’t you think?”
They both continued on as I managed to quickly shave and splash on some cologne. But when I went to brush my teeth, the toothpaste was gone. Slipping on my good jeans and my good top, I went out to the loungeroom to put on my shoes as we heard a large moan and then some shrieking from Robson’s room.
Up the hallway Robson came tearing out of his bedroom, his girlfriend and her blonde hair in tow, swathed in their bedsheet. They were both swearing their heads off as they pulled themselves into the bathroom and slammed the door behind them.
“OH GOD IT BURNS! YOU IDIOT! I TOLD YOU NOT TO USE TOOTHPASTE!” she was shrieking as she turned on the water.
Robson was quick on return, “It’s not my fault we ran out of lube! I was just improvising! Oh FUCK it STINGS!”
They began bickering and swearing as we sat on the couch, drinking and listening in on them. Truly hilarious stuff, I know that Robson went to uni with Steve, but really, he was classically stupid above anyone I’d ever known. He seemed oblivious to the world around him, and with next to none commonsense. Plus that time we went to Ikea, I ended up being the person setting up all his stuff; he had no idea how to follow their instructions.
“Hey guys, are you okay?” I decided to chime in after we’d had enough of their wails of pain.
There was some murmuring before a reply from Robson, “We… we’re fine! Really!”
Karyn finished off another drink, “Are you guys sure? We could drive you to the hospital-”
“-Or we could just neuter you two, it’d be tons easier,” chimed in Steve, now quite on his way to tipsy.
Robson presumably received a slap as we heard a sharp cry of pain from him. “Uh… we’re fine… have a good night out! Seeya!”
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Out in the Valley, we’d decided to start at Birdie Num Nums, before heading down to GPO and Steve was going to head off to The Beat. Steve was having great fun at Birdie’s, criticising outfits and talking to the few single girls around, making the large amount of guys there jealous. All the while drinking a heap of pre-mixed “lolly-water” drinks.
Karyn and I actually got talking over a jug of beer. She was telling me all about her job at Supre and some of the amusing customers who came in. She refused to shop there personally, but had no problems selling the merchandise. I know if I was knocking up something, I’d only use the materials I’d personally recommend. Unless the customer made a specific request. But that’s just me.
Turns out Karyn’s older sister had taken off to the UK and was marrying some British dude next year, so Karyn was going to visit her then. Steve however was looking plastered, “Come and dance!” he slurred, looking rather sweaty and with his eye-liner running.
Karyn and I stumbled onto the dancefloor, I shoved past people to help her through, not wanting to lose her in the crowd of bodies. The music sent a reverberating thump through everyone’s chest with every bassline. The lights were swirling and my hands were around Karyn’s petite frame.
Steve pressed in behind Karyn and we danced. Sweaty, gyrating fun dancing. I know I can’t, but I was drunk and didn’t really care. We were caught up in the moment. The place was so warm, my chest feeling the pulse of the music, my head and stomach both full of alcohol. I don’t even remember the song that was playing as Karyn reached up, and kissed me.
I just held her closer as we kissed, people knocking into us, but it didn’t matter. It was just us, a private moment, surrounded by people.
Steven decidedly hit me on the back, “Come on vacuum face, let’s go” he slurred rather loudly, “Do you think I could pass for sober to get into the Beat?”
I was feeling lightheaded and as I held onto Karyn’s hand and steadied myself on Steven’s shoulder I managed to garble, ‘I don’t think so, maybe it’s best to write this night off for you Steve.”
Karyn’s little nose was red, right on the end from the alcohol as we staggered down the steps and to the nearest taxi rank near the Brunswick St Mall. “Come on Steve, let’s get a taxi. You can go out tomorrow night and get some hot dude” said Karyn, hanging onto me, and giving me a little kiss.
“No way! I’m going to go dance with the fags!” he declared, hands on hips. Someone down in the line called out, “You tell him honey!”
“Nah mate, you’re trashed, you don’t want to wake up next to some old sixty-year-old do you” I tried to argue.
But it was all so bizarre, Steve backed away from us and ran to the crossing, looking left and right, trying to judge the traffic. It was packed with people this time of night, the main entertainment area of Brisbane and so many people trying to get from Point A to B, but everyone was generally in a good mood, or drunk.
Karyn clutched my arm, “We can’t let him-“
Steven ran onto the road, a grin on his face, “Seeya tomorrow morning!” he chirped as he ran onto the four lanes. Oh. Shit. He was going to run.
Across one lane. I looked at the traffic, it was all a bit of a blur to me, all the lights and the speed. I don’t know how it seemed to him.
Across two. A 4WD puttered slowly by, obscuring our view of Steven. But the second it passed by, I clutched onto Karyn.
Steven stepped onto the third lane and a red Corolla slammed into his left leg. He didn’t even cry out as he flipped up onto the bonnet and slammed down onto the asphalt, face up.
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