Flawless Ditto Giveaway

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Showsni

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I have a box full of flawless (max IV) Dittos that I'm not using, so I thought I'd give them away. Now, I'm not going to just give them away for free... Oh no! But, rather than ask for Pokémon or items, I thought I'd ask for a moment of your time. What I'd like is for people to read through and critique my fanfiction for me. Here's the link:

http://bmgf.bulbagarden.net/showthread.php?t=50541

Now, it's not all that spectacular; but I'd like to know where I could improve, and if people like it so far. So, to recap; I'll give away a flawless Ditto to anyone who reads through my whole fanfic and posts there how they feel about it. Please post the critique in the fanfic's thread, not here! But then post here to say you want the Ditto. And to make sure you've been paying attention, when you post here asking for the Ditto answer the following: What Pokémon causes the cave-in in Mt. Moon?

Thank you!

Okay, keeping track of the following...
(Strikethroughs for completed trades)

The following have posted here and in the fanfic thread:

RioTDoll *
Tyrael the Archangel *
Dip Head 14 *
Chjaes *
Ryuutakesh! *
Azzeh *
Camzoman *
pika pal *
giratinaoriginforme *
pikmin *
Jigglypuff *
Hytarin Narkov *
Kris *
mudkip99 *
Thunder410 *
Lbroccoli *
GameCodeTrainer *
Silver Azalea *
Veggietable *
Edo-kun *
tokawase *
Linda

The following have posted here:

a016113
jorge27
Darklink
Takoto
Hollow3582
Dedo
Ikuze
GSP
jackjt (offered a trade)
 
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I need to go now, but I promise to read your fic later. Please reserve a Ditto for me!

Also: Well...Pikachu hit the rock that caused the cave-in, according to the 'Pedia. But didn't Rhydon do some damage as well?
 
Are they legit? I'm not gonna read it 'till I know...
 
Really good. I'll list some pros and cons

Pros

Awesome detail and description
mostly good pacing
good job of desribing chaotic battles
good vocab lol
very appealing
sentence variety

Cons

pacing is VERY fast near the end
the characters can be flat at times


really good. You pulled of the dificult tasks of desribing events that would otherwise be confusing and describing chaotic scenes such as battles. Pacing is good until the end where things move very fast. Also the characters may be a little flat at times, they could use some distinctive features in their personality.

Very good :D



whew... on to pokemon business lol
I enjoyed it alot but I already have a flawless ditto lol
if don't really need anything in return, but it would be cool if you had other flawless pokes. If you don't, I don't mind, I really enjoyed it :D
 
I posted in the fanfic thread, with the name of the pokemon that causes the cave-in as well as the critique-of-sorts.
 
You could try to create a deeper understanding of the characters to make the reader feel closer and actually scared when the character gets scared. Also make Percy sarcastic, and a little awkward.
 
Nidoking.
Well, I don't really have anything good to give you... but if you're giving them away... Well I can come up with something...
 
I do need a ditto... let me read. I'll edit this post later.
 
The cave in was caused by an out of control Nidoking using earthquake.My comment is in the the story thread. I would definitely appreciate one of the Dittos
 
I've always wanted to try IV breeding, so I shall go read the fanfic~

EDIT: I'm done~! I know I only crit'd, but that was an okay read. Enjoyable. C: Ditto please? *u*

“Nidoking, no! Don’t use Earthquake!” = Answer to your Q.
 
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Or rather I will just post here, just to gain one more post...

Anyways, I read it all, reviewed it, and the answer is a Team Rocket's Nidoking who gets out of control and uses Earthquake... in am mountain. I get the feeling that Rocket doesn't have enough badges to control his probably stolen Nidoking. LOL

Ditto please. I need one badly.
 
Story was good
i would like any one of the dittos
The cave in at Mt. moon was caused by team rocket's Nidoking
 
That was really good! If your going to write more i`d like to read it.
The Nidoking caused the cave-in at mt.moon
 
Good God, I'm trying to be as critical as possible here. But even then, it's damn near nirvana. I clicked on the link expecting another fanfiction, but it was almost too hard to stop reading. I tried to criticize it on how it was explaining unrelated things in great detail, but I realized it was for emphasis. I then question whether or not the character being naked would warrant any other adverse side effects, but it's addressed, just as a normal person should react. The story made an effort, and the subtle things were included, so long as they impacted the story (no birdsong in the woods). It always kept me asking questions, but not for too long. The stale questions were answered and then newer ones were asked.
I was actually kind of disappointed when I learned that he's in the world of pokemon. Easily overlooked, though.

ONTO CHAPTER 2

Rational thoughts, fears add to the believability of the character. If I was thrust into the world of pokemon I would be thinking the same thoughts. It transfers it's mood, from one of discovery into adventure, and does so quite well. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

My disappointment has turned into sheer bliss. I discovered that my disappointment came from the change of pace, not the discovery. I love it, SO much. I don't want your damn ditto anymore, I just want to read this fanfiction.
 
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I finished it, published my review, send me vw when you can trade
 
Please note: The thread is from 16 years ago.
Please take the age of this thread into consideration in writing your reply. Depending on what exactly you wanted to say, you may want to consider if it would be better to post a new thread instead.
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