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TEEN: - Ongoing Legacy Of Ice

Karania

Elite Princess Of Bamarre
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Jun 19, 2003
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Legacy of Ice




Chapter 1


A Doctor’s Visit





She lay there, motionless and in silence, waiting for the voice of her mother to awaken her.

“Lorelei, honey, wake up its time to go to the doctor,” Lorelei’s mother said in a rather squeaky voice.

“I don’t want to go,” replied Lorelei hastily, she had already been awake but still lying there in bed motionless and eyes closed.

“You have to, dear…… Now wake up! I’m not going to say it again,” Her mother said now sounding more stern and mother-like.

“Alright,” replied Lorelei after a long pause.

She slowly opened her eyes and saw the glare coming in from the windows of her room. Then in a sudden motion she sat up and at first stared at the belongings in her small, tidy room. Slowly she crawled out of bed, and looking only at her bare-feet she walked to her bathroom.

She stood in front of her bathroom mirror, which now reflected upon an eight-year old face. She stared at her features: brown hair, green eyes, and a rather silky body. She stared for a while before reaching for her toothbrush. She walked out of the bathroom feeling refreshed and happy to go about for this was Sunday and there wasn’t any school. Slowly, she dressed herself.

“Hi, how are you doing today,” a nurse called as Lorelei and her mother entered a clinic located on the southern side of Celadon city.

“Perfect!” Exclaimed Lorelei, before her mother could answer the question.

“Do you have an appointment,” asked the nurse.
“Yes, we do…. We’re here to see Dr. Kim for Lorelei’s Annual Physical Check-up,” explained Lorelei’s mother.

“That’s right, you are the Korino’s correct?” The nurse asked again.

“Yes, that’s right our appointment is at nine-thirty.”

“Yes, alright just take a seat and the doctor will be with you shortly,” the nurse said while pointing to the chair in the direction of a chair found in a corner of the clinic.

“Come on Lorelei, the doctor will be here soon,” her mother had found her looking at a poster, which had a poke ball on it and with the words Pokemon League written across it.

Lorelei found unusual curiosity in this poster, but kept her questions to herself. Just as her mother and Lorelei sat down, her name was called. Lorelei walked into the doctor’s office and closed the door behind her.

Pokemon Weekly was the magazine Lorelei found her mother reading when she stepped out of Dr. Kim’s office. Her annual physics were done, but why was she not leaving yet…. “Why not?” She questioned herself. Dr. Kim signaled for Lorelei’s mother….

She would have to stay a bit longer. As Lorelei sat down, her mother walked into Dr. Kim’s office.

“Mrs. Korino, please make yourself comfortable,” Dr. Kim said directing his eyes to a chair as he sat down.

Mrs. Korino took a chair and moved it directly in front of the desk in which Dr. Kim was presently seated.

“Mrs. Korino, Lorelei is perfectly normal, other than the fact about her vision…. Dr. Kim wasn’t able to finish.

“We are presently trying to find her a pair as soon as possible,” said Mrs. Korino hastily.

“It’s not that” a long silence erupted, before the doctor continued to speak.

“Well you see, Mrs. Korino, Lorelei has a very weak mental composure, and any sudden change of emotions in her and she may just crack.”

“Doctor, what do you mean by crack?”

“Lose-it is a simple way to put it,” explained Dr. Kim. Usual cases such as these are very much focused on being perhaps unwelcome at school?” Dr. Kim was now starting to sound like a fortune-teller to Mrs. Korino, but still she answered.

“Yes, I’m afraid she is being picked on by the bullies at school.”

“Well is there any way to stop that?”

“I’ve tried to talk to the principal, but however the bullies don’t stop.”

A long silence followed until finally Dr. Kim spoke. “Well, see what you can do about it. If worst comes to worst, I’ll take care of this thing myself.”

“Thank you, Dr. Kim,” Mrs. Korino replied for she was happy to accept any sort of help.

“You’re very welcome,” replied Dr. Kim, standing up to open the door.

“And thanks for your time.” Lorelei and her mother walked back to their house.

On the way Mrs. Korino explained everything, and Lorelei vowed never to cry again…. At least when fending off a bully. That night Lorelei sank into her bed, thinking about her vow and what might happen the next day
 
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I started reading this, then came the massive paragraph, and I stopped.

When different characters talk, ALWAYS start a new paragraph. It's not only correct, but it also makes it much easier to read. I'll get back to reading this once it's got smaller paragraphs...
 
It's interesting and not bad, I'll tell ya that. I like the characters as well. Other than that, I would recommend longer chapters.
 
Hey! I reviewed this on FFN! Good to see it, and you, here. FFN scares me. o_o

But I'll say it again, because I know a lil more that happens. Lorelei automatically became a favorite of mine as soon as I read the words "ice master" attached to her name years ago. Her backstory, therefore, must be told expertly. Give Lorelei the history she deserves, mkay?

And thank you for fixing the paragraphs. ^_^
 
Just a question, are you posting here stories you've writen already a time ago? Not that anythings wrong with it, but if I compare it to some other stories of you I read just before this, I have to say that it really looks like an improvement. This fic's intersting. Keep on with this work :-)
 
yes, some of them I have written a while ago, but there's new stuff. For example Strange Things Happen When You LEast Expect 'Em actually has 30+ chapters. I'm adding new chapters to my stories all the time. If that answers your question.

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Legacy of Ice




Chapter 1


Why Me?





“Korino, Lorelei” said Mrs. Haply, Lorelei’s teacher. “Here,” Lorelei raised her hand. Lorelei answered as roll was called, she didn’t notice her teacher giving roll, but she noticed when her name was called. Mrs. Haply went on…..

“Kumara, Jek,” Mrs. Haply called the next name. A shiver went down Lorelei’s spine, as always she was afraid of that name.

A few minutes later Mrs Haply closed her roll back which indicated, that she was done with roll. “Now class, we are starting a new report on the history of the poke ball, but first you are to read chapters 3-6 in your History books, alright….” Mrs. Haply waited for a while. Nobody said anything……..

“Well get to work!” Mrs. Haply exclaimed, with the sound of impatience in her voice. Everyone worked until the loud siren of the bell rang for a short ten minute break. Lorelei got out of her seat…. She had been waiting to stretch her muscles for she was sitting and waiting for the rest of the class to finish their reading assignment after her. She walked out of the classroom and took twenty paces to the left and made a very sharp turn. There she found herself in front of the school playground. The sight of the grounds brought back very “pain” filled memories. She walked across the blacktop and into the benches located near the edge of the blacktop and the grass field.

She sat down and closed her eyes for a few seconds. Then in a sudden, she heard footsteps coming toward her. She opened her eyes suddenly and turned to find Jek and his gang of boys coming her way. She hastily sat up and began to walk in a fast pace toward the opposite direction of Jek.

Lorelei had a very hard time figuring out why she was such a bully magnet and why Jek, the school ego-driven, bully has to pick on her. But as Jek fastened his pace, Lorelei broke into a jog, which soon turned into a sprint. Lorelei was always astonished by the unbelievable great timing Jek had. He always chose the time when there was no one watching to commit his beatings.

Jek was now gaining on Lorelei…. Lorelei knew that she couldn’t outrun Jek, for Jek was probably ten times faster than her, and on top of her luck she was short on breath. Lorelei just plain gave up as she usually did and turned around to face Jek. Jek however, didn’t stop. He came plowing down, his hand out-stretched, and grabbed Lorelei by the shoulder and pushed her against the nearest tree. Now Jek’s grip tightened and pulled Lorelei’s arm back higher and higher. She swore that if he didn’t let go soon, her arm would surely snap in half.

“You should have kept running Zubat,” Jek’s voice now projected in a taunting sort of way. “It might have made things more interesting… Zubat.”

“Why do you keep calling me that? I’m not blind,” Lorelei screamed in both anger and pain.

“You seem that way,” Jek replied nastily.

“I’m not blind, I’m just near-sighted!”

“SHUT UP, Zubat!”

Lorelei was now feeling a bit queasy, she knew that she couldn’t hold back her tears any longer…. Then she remembered her promise. She took a deep breath and with her free arm shot back at Jek with a punch at his private…..

Jek then released his grip and crouched down without saying a word. Lorelei stood there and waited, and just out of anger she punched him in the face and stormed off…. Barely able to hold back her tears and looked back.

Jek’s friends were helping him up and Lorelei saw what she had done to his face. She thought quietly to herself…….. It wasn’t so bad….. if she had put more strength into it he might have got a bloody nose. But then she realized that Jek was going to get back at her for this.

As the siren of the bell rang again for the lunch, this time everyone walked out of the classroom and headed for the cafeteria. Everyone ate as fast as they could so they could get more than enough time to step out and play on the school playground. Everyone that is, except Lorelei….. she always stays until the janitor arrived and convinced her to leave the cafeteria. Then she would slowly walk to the playground for she doesn’t want to meet Jek. However that day the janitor arrived early, and Lorelei was left with too much time to get beat-up…… she felt like throwing up.

As she approached the playground, Jek had already spotted her. Jek, which had perfect timing, tailed her until the right moment. Followed by his friends, Jek was an unstoppable at school. As they fasten their pace catch Lorelei. Lorelei must have saw them for she was running as hard as she could to avoid them until that bell rang. But then she thought…. So what if the bell rang…. Would Jek stop his beating…. And she didn’t even know what time it was…. Why waste your energy… she thought… turn around an face him.… you can do what you did to him last time…. But what about his friends.

Lorelei stopped thing just about then. She would face them… if not know than never any more of this being bullied around crap…. She would face her fears…. Once and for all, Lorelei sucked up her courage, and turned around. The sudden stop was too fast on most of Jek’s friends, whom quickly tumbled on the grass, showing an embarrassed look on their faces. Lorelei just stood there… and waited… she wanted this to be locked in their memories forever. Her judgement was completely wrong.

As Jek and his friends got to their feet they surrounded Lorelei in every corner and closed in until she was completely surrounded and Jek and friends were close enough to touch each other.

There was a weird silence, and then Jek spoke, “How brave… this is the first time I’ve seen you act like this… Zubat.” Jek’s friends made some quiet apparently this was highly funny to them.

“For the last time, DON’T CALL ME THAT!” Lorelei shouted, but with each breath the courage slipped away from her.

“Oh Zubat I guarantee that this isn’t the last time you will pay for getting away from me,” with that said a blur reached Lorelei’s stomach and before Lorelei could react it revealed itself as a fist. Lorelei clutched her stomach slowly as she keeled, and then bent down and touched the grass. Then in frenzy Lorelei was kicked several dozen times by each of Jek’s friends and himself. They stopped just as the bell rang to announce the end of the lunch break.

As the kids left, she was the only one who was lying out there in pain. She was about to burst into tears, but she stopped herself…. each time she did so there was more pain. The world was so unfair and unkind to her… Lorelei thought. It wasn’t her fault she was such a bully magnet, it wasn’t her fault that her parents were short on cash, it wasn’t her fault that she was near-sighted… was it? She lay there in the green grass trying to contain her tears and try the pain grew stronger… she would hold it… she promised herself… as she lay there… waiting……
 
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