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EVERYONE: - Complete Molly Hale's Christmas

MollyHaleIsMyFriend

MollyHaleIsMyFriend

Friend Of Molly Hale
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Molly Hale's Christmas

Ash just got done moving all of Molly Hale's furniture into the house; Molly sits down at her little desk and makes a Christmas list.

"Welcome to your new home, Molly" said Ash

"Thanks, Ash" said Molly

it is snowing 10 inches of snow

Ash and Molly are sitting by the fire

"I love Christmas, Molly" said Ash

"So do I" said Molly

Mrs. Ketchum takes Ash and Molly to the mall Christmas shopping

at lunchtime; Ash and Molly have cheeseburgers and fries; Ash eats his burger with onions, pickles and mustard, Molly has hers with kethcup, onions, pickles and mustard

after they shop for Christmas presents; they wrap and put them under the Christmas tree

at bedtime Molly and Ash are in their beds; tons of snow was falling down

"I'm so excited about Christmas" said Ash

"So am I" said Molly

they sleep until the morning comes

the next morning. 60 feet of snow falls

Ash and Molly open their presents

Molly got a dollhouse, dolls, and other toys, and disney books, and more chairs

Ash got a desk/chair set, a yo-yo, a watch and pokemon books

"What a wonderful Christmas" said Ash

"You guessed it" said Molly

Molly hugs Ash

this Christmas was the best Christmas Ash and Molly ever had.
 
Last edited:
Um, don't I know you from somewhere? I swear I've met you before.

But where to start. To be honest, this fic has very little to no plot at all. You just tell us what Ash and Molly do, but it has no soul at all. Especially the burger scene. Wow, they're eating burgers---but do they like the burgers? Dislike them? Think they're putrid? What? You have to tell your readers what is going on beyond a shallow description.

This story also has no context. We are just plopped into Ash moving Molly's furniture, then they're eating burgers, then they have sixty feet of snow and open their presents.

I'm sorry, but this falls far short of being an even fair fic.
 
MollyHaleIsMyFriend said:
Ash just got done moving all of Molly Hale's furniture into the house; Molly sits down at her little desk and makes a Christmas list.
Click to expand...
Hope it's not using unown tiles :D

MollyHaleIsMyFriend said:
"Welcome to your new home, Molly" said Ash
Click to expand...
Why was she moving?
MollyHaleIsMyFriend said:
at bedtime Molly and Ash are in their beds; tons of snow was falling down

"I'm so excited about Christmas" said Ash

"So am I" said Molly

they sleep until the morning comes

the next morning. 60 feet of snow falls
Click to expand...
Their beds? At the same house or in their respective houses? And wouldn't it be a supernatural thing to get six-stories of snow? I mean, where do you live where you get more than five or six feet? Is Articuno around? Are they in Antarctica? WTH?

MollyHaleIsMyFriend said:
Ash got a desk/chair set, a yo-yo, a watch and pokemon books
Click to expand...
Yes, because Ash is SUCH the heavy studier... lol...
 
Don't double post.

Frankly, this fic needs work. Being in the holiday spirit is NOT a plot. You should encorporate it into the fic rather than just telling us in an aside.

You really need to tell us the WHYs. Why is Ash helping Molly move? Where is Molly moving to? Why is he spending Christmas with her instead of his own mother or his friends? Where are her parents?

And honestly, sixty FEET of snow? I'll grant that the Pokémon world has bizarre weather, but the record snow depth in the real world was only 37 feet 7 inches, not even close to your blizzard. And then to have that in a single night? Sorry, can't buy it.
 
I'm sorry, but as Mr. Sukizo would say, "Certainly not remarkable." This is something the new voice actors would do. :shudders:
 
I must say it's a surprise seeing this back again.

To make this weirdness somewhat on topic: Adult Molly is hawt 8)
 
I found this pure hilarity.

It could be material for a quality internet fad if it carried more catchy phrases and a couple dozen exclamation marks.
 
Please note: The thread is from 20 years ago.
Please take the age of this thread into consideration in writing your reply. Depending on what exactly you wanted to say, you may want to consider if it would be better to post a new thread instead.
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