EVERYONE: - Ongoing my best friend

[espeon_628]

Prolong: Miriam's sorrow

I got up really early today, because my annoying, little brother Trevor put Grimer poison in my ear. I yelped, "Disgusting! Trevor, I am going to get you." Trevor ran downstairs with his Growlithe pajamas on. I chased after him with my long blonde hair down to ground and my long Piplp nightgown on. Trevor ran so fast and because of my nightgown and hair I ended up tripping down the stairs. Mom and Dad were in their downstairs bedroom and came out, because they heard my crash. I ended up passing out.

Mom called out in fear, "Honey, are you okay?" Trevor said with both laughter and fear, "Dumb Miriam, tripped down the stairs just like Pickachu did in the first Pickachu short. No wonder she doesn't have any friends." Dad yelled at Trevor, "Trevor, stop acting like a Charizard. Are you as blind as a Zubat, to notice that your sister could be seriously hurt, because of you."

I stared at my dad with a grin and gently lifted myself up. Mom gave me a huge hug of relief. And dad asked me if I was alright and grinned. Trevor was now upset. Mom said, "Today is the big day Miriam, that you start your Pokemon journey. But first, we might need to get your haircut. And I know just the place."

I got my long blonde hair into braids and my old cap on and as well as my clothes. Mom got out her Rapidash and rode off to Sandgem Town to get my first Pokemon and my haircut. We would be in for a big surprise.

 

[espeon_628]

Chapter One

Miriam had to read the silly, dressy pokemon magazines, pokemon poems by Professor Oak, and watch the coordinating contest in Johto. The contest caught the eye of Miriam and she looked really enthused as she saw a female coordinator named May from Littleroot Town show off her Skitty's blizzard in Johto. The judges and audience were thrilled with her proformance. And Miriam got so carried away that she forgot about her silly haircut and the fussy girl.

The fussy girl approached the television and said, "I am going to be in those pokemon coordinating contests and I am going to be way better than you." Miriam started argue with this girl until it was time for haircut. She walked away from the fussy girl until she had a Voltorb toy thrown at her. She got ticked off, but ignored her. The man saw this and gave the fussy girl a spanking outside. Miriam's little brother caught it with his trusty camera that he always brought with him. He was secretly with Miriam and her mom.

 

[espeon_628]

Chapter Two

Miriam was finally ready to get away from the fussy girl named Emily. She went to Madam J'azel's chair. Behind there was a shiny, green Scizor ready to chop off Miriam's hair. J'azel ordered that the Scizor use metal claw. It cut a lock off of miriam's hair. Her hair was now over and it only took like a minute. Mom paid J'azel thirty poke for her service and Miriam and her mom left the salon.

Miriam and her mom had the Rapidash reared to outside of the salon that was ironically next door to Professor Rowan's lab. Rowan creeped out Miriam, but she thought about the thought getting her pokemon. Rowan asked, "Which pokemon are you going to choose?" Miriam asked, "What do you have?" Rowan answered, "Turtwig and Piplup are already taken." Miriam said, "I'll take Chimchar." Rowan gave the Chimchar's poke ball to Miriam and she yelled, "Okay I have a Chimchar."

The young fussy girl named Emily had come into the lab with her mom being dragged. Emily shouted, "I wanted that Chimchar, so I'll battle you for it." Emily grabbed a pokeball containing a Pachurisu and the fight was on.

 

[espeon_628]

Chapter Three

Rowan and the mother of Emily yelled at Emily. Emily ignored them and told the Pachurisu to use sweet kiss on Chimchar. Chimchar dodged it and used flame wheel and it Pachurisu. Pachurisu used sweet kiss again and it worked. Then Pachurisu used spark and that got the chimchar to faint.

Miriam lost and was about to loose her Chimchar until. Emily got so attatched to Pachurisu that she let Miriam keep the Chimchar. She said, "Your Chimchar is weak and not as cute as my Pachurisu and possibly will never be." Emily asked her mom if she could have the Pachurisu, but her mom agreed and with the permission of Rowan. Emily got a Pachurisu and Miriam got Chimchar. Miriam named Chimchar, Ashton and Emily named Pachurisu, Thunder Squirrel.

Miriam, mom, and her brother finally came home. Trevor got in trouble with dad for secretly following mom and Miriam. Miriam now had a friend in Chimchar and also a rival, who she would constantly fight against. The next day, Miriam and Ashton left Twinleaf town and set out on their journey.

 

[espeon_628]

Chapter Four

Miriam and Ashton were starting on Route 201 just outside of Twinleaf Town. Today, Miriam thought about training with Ashton and catching her first pokemon. Little be known to her, that there was an evil team of thieves called Team Universe, who go after rare pokemon, whether they belong to a trainer or not.

Miriam and Ashton came to the Bewilderment Forest, where alot of pokemon and trainers were. Miriam was challenged by some of them, but managed to defeat all of them. She even caught a Shinx and a Starly. Then Ashton and Miriam decided to rest, but when they sat to an old Oak Tree, out of no where came a sonic boom. It hit Ashton pretty hard. Ashton fainted and Miriam went to his aid. Only to find her beloved pokemon gone into the tree. He was hiding from whatever did attack him.

Then footsteps got closer and out of nowhere came a large net. That caught Ashton and alot of other pokemon. Miriam noticed alot of trainers crying, because they lost their pokemon. Then two figures came out of smoke on top of one of the trees just near the captured pokemon. The figures emurged as a beautful, blonde hair woman named Lilly and a male figure with black hair with green highlights named Brendan and with them was a Buizel.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

How many times am I going to have to say this to people? Stop making fics that read like recaps. Give us some sense that the story's happening, not that you're telling it to us at a later date.

 

[Turtle Tamer Kammy]

I would think Grimer poison would kill you? Especially in your ear (*coughHAMLETcough*)

 

[espeon_628]

Chapter Five

"Give me back my Chimchar, right now!" said I. Team Universe with their globe and outer space T-shirts and black pants with the letters T and U, and with their white boots jumped out of the tree just near me. Lilly said, "Oh, do you want your pathetic Chimchar back? Then you have to battle us. If we win then you have to let us by, but I bet if you win then we'll give the pokemon back. Brendan said,"We'll have a double battle."

I was shocked, because the only thing I happen to have was a Starly, but then a fifteen-year-old boy with a blue bubble bandana, white, long sleeve shirt, navy blue khakis, gray boots, yellow scarf, and brown, short hair came out of nowhere. He said, "Alright, I am up to the challenge. Go Daniel (Empoleon)." I now had a partner and he and I battled Team Universe and we ended up winning.

We ended up winning and Team Universe released the pokemon. And they ran off with their Buizel quite misserbly. Ashton ran over to with tears coming out his eyes to me. The boy returned the Empoleon to its poke ball. He introduced himself, "My name is Timothy and I was glad to battle with you." I introduced myself to Timothy and he offered to travel with me and Ashton.

 

[Ino-Chan]

Nice discription on Ch. 5.

 

[Turtle Tamer Kammy]

The descriptions are too crammed. If someone is in a panic, are they going to note all the physical features of a person? You also mentioned "We ended up winning" (I won't even start with that :/) twice.