TEEN: - Complete Off-Guard! The Hero

[Octomo]

Hello everyone, my name is Octomo and welcome to Off-Guard! Before I start, most characters are made and own by me. Some (not yet mentioned) were adopted from previous owners and I'm giving credit to their ORIGINAL owners. So please don't take them and claim them as your own. (I made them with love and regret during middle school.) With that out of the way, let's start the table of contents:

Table of contents:​

1. The Summary
2. Character profiles

The chapters

• 0 - Darkness Over Light
• 1 - The Hero
• 2 - The Missing Princess of The Glade Kingdom
• 3 - The Dream
• 4 - Two-Way Ambush!

More coming soon….​

Summary:​

an original story where a young Hafu named Brendan Sparks meets Ellen Glade, who isn't from Otā. Or this world. The only problem is, how did she get here?!

Character profiles:​

(will be updating this when new characters and informations are being introduce in later chapters)

Brendan Sparks
Ellen Glade
Ra Kana
Momo Johnson
Jay-Jay Johnson

Rating teen for mild language and violence. Feedbacks and critiques are very appreciate, I would like to improve.

Enjoy your reading.~

 

[Octomo]

Chapter 0 - Darkness Over Light
​

It was dark; but the moon was bright with the beautiful lights on the other side of the ship. I, Ellen Glade of the royal Glade family, wanted be alone. I'm going to be married with a knight from another kingdom. I thought it going be great, but I can't trust him. I don't know what to do…

The knight in shiny armor… but he's 29! He is from a kingdom we declare war on. I don't understand why my father would trust an enemy; he looked selfless and full himself. This world, Koinia, shouldn't be this heartless. We suppose to love each other like a family; if my mother was still alive…

My heart-felt heavy from saying those words, but it is true. She is with God now, I just wish I could hear her voice again. Just one more time. Why do I have to exist… huh, something soft were running through my cheeks, tears?

I couldn't stop myself from sobbing. This wasn't what any princesses' happy ending would be if they're not happy. I just want someone who is a brave knight, inside his heart. Someone who care not just me, but everyone! I want someone to love me like he love himself, someone who will protect the ones he truly loves. Yes… a real knight… my real knight.

The nice breeze is becoming stronger. A strong gust of wind hit me. It feel like someone was trying push me off the air ship. My scream, my catch, and my grip to live. Crying for help, the music from the performers was getting louder to my ears. I was holding the lower handles from the ship. Looking down and seen the lifeless forest below me; no one ever return from that forest. I'm afraid being in that situation. I tried to pick myself up, but the air ship was too slippery. My heart was racing; the old knight, my fiance, came. For once I was happy to see him.

"Your imperial highness," the knight crackled.

He picked me up with one hand and crackled again, why is he laughing as if this is a joke? I don't understand this guy.

"Ahh the performers are doing a wonderful job distracting everyone. Unfortunately, no one didn't hear you crying for help. Hmm, you look so cute as my slave. Ha ha!"

!!

"Mine, your face feel so soft and you smell really nice. On second thought, you can't be my slave, but my lover…"

He's worse than I thought, he's a monster! He kisses me forcefully. I don't want this happen to me, I must do something to stop him! Luckily, I know one spot he didn't fully armored. I kick him below the belt, it work! He let go my arms and I run away from him. I gotta tell my father what he coulda did to me. Huh! Why can't I move?

"Well well, trying to tell your father eh?"

That voice… it can't be!

"Your father is too busy having fun. You don't want to disturb him don't you?"

My father once told me only experienced mages could master this kind of spell. She the most wanted witch in the kingdom but she only 17! Why is she doing this?

"Well, you are the King's little girl, right? And the most valuable star child. I wish I could kill you like he killed my parents, but I want you to suffered and watch your family died and your precious kingdom burn. Anything you like to say, princess?"

"….I….I…"

What?! I can't speak! I don't understand why would she do such a thing?! What is going to happen to me? No please...don't do this…

"Awww, you're crying? Well I could forget killing your family, but I can't turn back… oh well!"

She snap her fingers and something behind me was sucking me in. Is this the forbidden dark magic I been hearing about? I-I can't breathe. Everything is going dark. I could still see her, the ship's light and the moon. She wave her hand with her small smirk and snap her fingers again. Everything went dark.

"Oooh this going be so much fun!" The girl cheered.

"Diamond," the old knight approached. "What did you do to her? I wanted her to be my lover…."

"Quit your whining and let go, we got work to do."

"But that spell... will they find her?"

"Don't waste your breathe, no one will find her. Not even your pervy self.

"What?! Where did you put her?"

"Oooh, let just say another land..."

 

[Octomo]

Chapter 1 - The Hero
(April 6th,2016)
​

The region of Kanto. Where a special ward city, Otā or Otaku city as one of the borough of Tokyo. The students of Tsubasasōgō High school just got out for their vacation. Though that wasn't what the students were cheering about. There something going on in the school court. A fight? A festival? Neither, a soccer game. Everyone were cheering for the soccer players, especially the school girls. The team's best players just got on the field and that what the students were cheering for.

Ra, a young foreign student from America. No one knows his real name but he like to be called Ra. With his sister and older brother there cheering for him, he feeling full confident.

And everyone's favorite player and Ra's buddy, Brendan Sparks. His mother was Japanese and his father was American, making him a hafu. But the school loves him and found him very attractive. That why there's a lot of school girls around.

The announcer was getting very excited from this close game; Kamata High school vs. Tsubasasōgō High. The breeze was gentle and the petals from the cherry blossom trees blown through the court. Making it a beautiful scene. Everyone was watching Brendan striking the ball to the goal. Another point to Tsubasasōgō!

One more point and their school win the game. It's 4-4 and Brendan passed the ball to Ra. Everyone watched him begin his signature move; The Flaming Phoenix! Ra kicked the ball up to the air, goalie tried to blocked it, but the beam of the Sun slightly blind him and the ball was in. Without the goalie noticed! GOAL!

Tsubasasōgō High won the game! Everyone was cheering for the young heroes, their opponent were down and all, but they were happy and congrats the winners for teamwork. Everyone was happy for each other, even Brendan himself.

°°°

The sun began to set, everyone was saying their goodbyes, but not Brendan and Ra. They lived together with Ra's brother and sister. After they received their goodbye gifts and school girls' confessions being denied, the two met Ra's brother and sister as they walked through the streets of Otā.

"That was a good game you two!" Ra's sister, Momo cheered.

"Yup, you two were amazing!" Ra's older brother, Jay Jay crackled. "Your mother would be proud of you, Brendan."

"Thanks guys," Brendan sighed.

"Hey, you should go visit her; you been a while since you visit her and she would love to see you again."

"Yea you're right. I'll be home when dinner start."

"You got it!" Jay Jay patted Brendan's head before he turned to the opposite direction. Jay Jay was right, he was been busy with school. He totally forgot visiting his mother. Though it going to a long train ride there and back. At least there won't be school till August.

The train arrived just in time and it not in rush hour. Brendan step in, but he overheard from two commuters about a discovery.

"Hey, did you heard about a warp hole in the news?" One man asked.

"Huh, no." The other man answered. "Must be a inner joke from NASA."

"I don't know, they sounds serious to me. They said it getting too close to the planet."

A warp hole eh; Brendan thought. The sun starting to disappeared through the horizon. Though he doesn't believed it either, but he couldn't stop thinking about it. Were they saying the world going to end?

°°°

"Here's lies Kurosawa Inori, a great friend, a great mother." Brendan was sitting next to the gravestone of his mother. Having a conversation with her, as if she was there. He was eating a pork bun, which he brought some close by the cemetery. He laughed, smiled, and frown. Realizing he missed his mother.

Inori was beautiful, pure, and loving to everyone she meet. But since that tragic fire, that burn away her dreams and her life. Brendan begin to cried, he doesn't want to be alone in this heartless world without his mother. The wind current started picking up as the cool breeze passed through him. Blowing his snow white and raven black hair, as if someone was behind him brushes it.

Brendan wiped his tears off and smiled. Knowing his mother was there, comforting him. Something beeping on his wrist. The watch said 6 o'clock. He going be late for dinner! He picked up his backpack and ran off. But stopped and turned to the gravestone.

"Thanks mom…" He smiled. "I'll see you next week!"

As Brendan got off the train and walked his way home, the clouds were getting darker. The weatherman said it going be a storm tonight, and Brendan forgot to bring an umbrella. The rain was getting heavier and the roads were hard to see. Everyone was cautioned about their safety. But a pink-haired girl, wearing an odd torn gown, running through the crowd.

A truck driver who was having trouble seeing the road from the heavy rain. The girl ran to the street while the truck was heading her way. Her big gown caught the driver's attention and stomp the breaks. Everything was going slow, the truck, the crowd, and the girl turning her head in fear. The strong light of the truck blinded her but something pushed her out the way. It was Brendan who pushed her away. The truck skidded before stopping. The crowd watched to see if the girl got hit or not. The truck driver ran toward her and Brendan, yelling and swearing how clueless she was. She wasn't responding and the boy shouted at the driver.

"Hey!" Brendan yelled. "Can't you see she's hurt!"

There was a big bruise on her head. Must been hitting the solid ground with his weight. The driver stopped; nervously. He helped the two kids to his truck and drove them to the closest hospital. Brendan also was hurt from saving the girl, though they were just bruises. However, that wasn't what he was going for.

°°°

Jay Jay, Momo, and Ra were waiting for Brendan in their small apartment. There only two rooms, one for Momo and the other for the boys. While Jay Jay sleep in a kotatsu. Jay Jay worked as a commercial star. Though paid decent, he decided to lived small till his brother and sister and their friend moved in. Worried, Momo looked at the clock and it was pm 8:05.

"Hmm," she spoked. "Where is he, it's already dark."

"Don't worry sis," Ra comforted her. "He must be riding the train by now."

"But it can't take him this long. Plus there a storm. I don't want him be stuck in the rain for too long."

"Calm down you two," Jay Jay jumped in while preparing dinner. "He'll be fine, he might be here in any minute now. Plus food is ready!"

"Uugh, finally! I'm starving!"

"You're always hungry, Ra."

The house phone rang; while Momo and Ra eat their dinner Jay Jay answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Ah, hey Brendan! Where are you? Ra and Momo are worried where yo…"

"Hey! Why you said my name first?!" Ra yelled.

"Huh? The hospital?! Why you're doing there?"

"Hmmm, saving a girl eh?"

"I'll be right there just don't move!"

Jay Jay hung up while his siblings were slient. Worrying about their friend, they were waiting for their brother's response.

"Brendan found a cutie!" Jay Jay joked.

"Not funny!!" Ra and Momo shouted in unison.

The hospital was busy, with the cautioned people being caution but still deal with injuries. Some were just bruises, some were serious. Brendan and the girl were lucky that it wasn't in the serious category. But he was worry for her; she was scared when the doctors were treating her wounds. The doctors said her language was odd as if she not from here. Two young nurses were walking passed Brendan before they giggled.

“What a cutie!” one nurse mentioned to her friend. “Hey did you know that cutie saved a girl?”

“Wow, really?” the other nurse respond.

Their conversation continued till Brendan couldn't hear them anymore. The boy sighed, girls found him attractive because he was a hafu. The boy found the room where the girl was. She calm down yet still scared. He want to talk to her, but he didn't want to scared her. But, it now or never!

"Ok…" Brendan repeated. "Ok… ok…"

The teen opened the door and took a deep breath and begin his speech.

"Hello, my name is Brendan Sparks. I hope you're ok with your injuries and I'm glad you're ok. You don't have to thank me for saving you, I just want to know where you're from and stuff. A lot of girls in my school like me but I really don't like them back. I haven't have a girlfriend yet and you're the first I ever came close to…. Well literally. Though we just met, but I would like to have your phone number or something like that. And maybe we be friends! Haha…"

The room was empty.

"Oh…" Brendan ended. The girl was hiding in the dark, by a fake tree. However, she somehow understand what he was saying. She slowly crawled toward to the light before the boy noticed her.

"Huh? Oh there you are." He walked in. Though the girl was still scared.

"Don't worry, I won't hurt you." The girl's stomach was groaning loudly. Brendan laughed. He realized he still have some pork buns in his bag. Luckily he didn't eat them all.

"I have these pork buns you could have."

Brendan handed her the bun; the girl hesitated but slowly grabbed the bun. Sniffing and tasting it before took a bite on it. Her beautiful blue eyes widen and started eating the bun like Ra eat his.

"Haha you like it?" He asked. She nodded wildly.

"Great! I have another one if you want it."

He handed her another pork bun. She took it and ate it after five bites.

"Hmm, at least she understand english." Brendan mentioned. "I wonder why those doctors said that…"

"Umm, excused me?" The girl asked. "Where am I?"

"Huh! You speak English?!"

"You didn't answer my question! I demand an answer! Where am I?"

"Ugh, you're in the hospital."

"Hospital?…"

"Yea… a place where you get better when you're sick or injured like us."

"Injured…"

"Umm yea. Like us. See?"

Brendan showed the girl his patched arm. She looked confused and poked it. It still hurt, but he didn't mind. In fact, it felt funny every time she poked it. He laughed a little before a familiar voice was heard from outside.

"Brendan?" Jay Jay knocked the door. "Is that you?"

"Oh hey guys."

"Brendan!" Momo cried. "I hope you're alright!"

"I'm fine guys, I was just talking to… uhh... What's your name?"

"Oooh, didn't ask her name. You just lost one point." Jay whispered.

"Will you cut that out!" Ra kicked his brother's knee.

"...I'm princess Ellen of the Glade Kingdom.…"

"… you lost two more points for liking daddy's little princess…."

"Quit it!" Ra kicked his brother's face in.

While Ra and Jay fighting, Brendan and Momo were listening to Ellen's story. She was getting angry when she mentioned about her fiance and the girl and how she'll going killed her family. She was worried for her father, her sisters and the kingdom will die on the hands of a villain.

However, Brendan didn't believed her story; she might be losing her marbles. As for Momo, on the other hand, believed her.

"We must help Ellen!" Momo cried holding her like a child.

"What?!" Brendan asked. "How YOU believed her? She must be sick!"

"Brendan Sparks! You forgot one thing about me. I know who telling the truth and who isn't. Her body language didn't moved suspiciously like a liar."

"Ugh, Momo I can't believed you're doing this. this isn't your stupid shoujo manga!"

"Well if you don't believed me, I guess I'll help her myself! Plus my manga aren't stupid"

"Fine! If you two get in trouble don't cry to me!"

"Fine!"

The two turned their heads away, both upset. Ra and Jay Jay continued fighting but realized everyone was quiet.

"Huh? What's just happened?" Jay Jay interpreted.

°°°

Back in Jay Jay's apartment, Ellen was telling everyone her life as a princess of the kingdom. Brendan didn't want to listened, so he in his room sleeping. Momo, Ra and Jay Jay were happy and excited to Ellen's fantasy life. When she mentioned about her fiance, she stopped and frowned.

"What's wrong Ellen?" Ra asked.

"Nothing," she respond. "It just I'm getting marry to a guy that… I don't like. But that not why I stopped. My father choose who I should get marry, but I wish I could tell him that I want to choose. I want someone who love me for being myself, not my royalty. Unfortunately, that how it is in my kingdom."

"Well, have you found someone you like?" Momo asked.

"Hmm, Someone you might know soon…" Ellen smiled.

​

 

[Flaze]

So first of all I actually have a question to make. Is english your first language? because your writing style actually reminded me of back when I first started (I'm a spanish speaker but I learned english) and it seems like you're still trying to get a hang of the language, like there's a lot of switching between tenses or using the tenses in different orders that make it sound odd.

That being said, it still makes sense, like you can still get across what the story is about. I'd say it'd be best if you try to work a bit more on your prose and the tenses and words you use and how much sense they make since english can be a language that flips things around a lot when you try to translate it to other languages, maybe read more stories in english and stuff like that.

Aside from that, the story itself is kind of interesting. For one, so far it seems like it's non-Pokemon which is okay since there aren't that many Non-Pokemon (I assumed you were referring to normal world Kanto and we haven't gotten any mention of Pokemon in the last couple of chapter) the first couple chapters kind of feel like a combination between a fairy-tale a la Enchanted and like an anime, like just from the japanese setitng and a normal boy suddenly discovering someone from another word gave me that sort of anime-like feel (though it's a fairly common trope used throughout all media) that and the specific type of comedy like when Ra suddenly hits Jay Jay and it's treated for comedy, slapstic to that level is usually more applied to anime or manga or comedy cartoons than novels and such. This isn't bad though and it's your own style after all so don't worry about it too much.

But on that note, I actually wonder what this is going to be about now that Brendan and his friends know that Ellen comes from another world of sorts and I also wonder what's going to happen with Ellen herself, maybe giving a bit more info in regard to her world/kingdom and how it works will help.

So, I'll continue to read and if you want any help with this you can send me a Conversation message if you like :O also, if I'm wrong about the whole english not being your first language then I'm wholeheartedly sorry and I'll put my foot in my mouth xD;