MATURE: - Complete Pokemon: Everglow

[Anime Psyclone]

This will be a series with many sensitive topics, like pollution and terrorism. For that reason, I label it as a Mature story. The music video for this song was also an inspiration.

Spoiler: Chapter 1: The new Kanto

Hi, my name is Lily, and I am worried about the fate of Kanto, this region we live in. It keeps getting harder to get food here, we have to import it from Johto or Hoenn. Prices keep on increasing, and the Safari Zone has closed down. Pokemon like Rhyhorn and Khangaskhan are harder to find, and I heard someone caught a bunch of Electrode and had them all use Explosion in Mount Moon, and the mountain isn’t looking too good right now… It’s been over 20 years since Cinnabar erupted, and since then we made a floating city there, where I live. Me and my partner Lapras love exploring Kanto, but people are saying that, well… That the environment is being poisoned… They point out that a stream near Pallet Town is filled with trash. I hope nothing bad happens to Kanto, after all… It is my home.The Champion is the son of the previous champion Blue Oak, his name is Midnight Oak. He denies any problems with the environment… Again, I hope he’s telling the truth…

 

[Beth Pavell]

I get the feeling that you know what you want to say, but not so much how to go about writing a story. There's a couple of things I can suggest on that count. The Academy articles in the Written Word will probably have something useful to read in there. And if you don't already, read a lot of fiction. Fanfiction is ok, though it has to be said, you can pick up bad habits from other fanfiction authors - that's not really an issue with the stories on this forum, but it is with fanfiction.net. The more you read, the more you'll pick up about how to about actually telling the story

 

[Anime Psyclone]

I get the feeling that you know what you want to say, but not so much how to go about writing a story. There's a couple of things I can suggest on that count. The Academy articles in the Written Word will probably have something useful to read in there. And if you don't already, read a lot of fiction. Fanfiction is ok, though it has to be said, you can pick up bad habits from other fanfiction authors - that's not really an issue with the stories on this forum, but it is with fanfiction.net. The more you read, the more you'll pick up about how to about actually telling the story

My sister writes fanfictions, but I can’t get any info on how to write. This chapter was supposed to basically explain what’s changed in Kanto(Since it is over 20 years after GSCHGSS). I will try and improve, but hey! Practice makes perfect!

 

[AceTrainer14]

Hey there! I know it's a bit late but wanted to give you a belated welcome to the Workshop If you have any queries or need any help, feel free to message me or one of the other mods (you can find us all at the bottom of the rules here)

You definitely have an interesting idea here - I haven't seen much in the way of environmental based fics in the Pokemon world, so you have a lot of interesting opportunities to mine this world you've created for story opportunities. My biggest advice would be to take time and flesh out your ideas. You clearly have the ideas, but you've crammed a lot into this chapter so there isn't room for it to breathe: less than 200 words and you have 11 different revelations/facts being put into it. One way you could improve it is if you set the chapter in Lily's house/hometown and having her going about her day, building the world slowly rather than laying it all on the line straight away. You have so many good ideas for a story that it would be a shame to have them all get buried beneath each other.

If you have any other questions, feel free to message me and I can explain things further. This chapter may be brief but it shows a lot of potential and you can draw it out with a slower take on things.