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reboot of pokemon

betolycan

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hey this is a little project im working on, im no novelist so my abilities for literature arent that good, also im no english native speaker so i get short for words a lot!!
anyway i initially had thought of making a manga of my ideas, but somehow got interested into trying it novel version first as a way to experiment....so hope you like here it is



Pokemon undead

As the clouds passed by, the Young man was there just sitting on top of an old rusting desk, besides the biggest tree of the whole town, an enormous oak signature and iconic symbol of the most influent and acknowledged person of the quiet pallet town. But not only was there a hill, with a big tree, but more important was the edifications that surrounded it; fruit of several decades of hard and diligent work from our recognized Prof. Oak, that as warm hearted as he could be, decided to create an institution that could provide education to the otherwise rough children of the town, and also find a successor to one of his biggest researches which sadly hadn’t been nor finished nor announced to the public, although this last one was not something the enthusiastic scientist was about to tell to anyone, as he wanted to watch and see the more promising of them all.
The young one, watching the smoke that came out of his mouth and the tip of his cigarette between his fingers had been part of this institution for quite a while now, even living there as fate hadn’t been the nicest of his friends and left him alone without parents, siblings or a supporting person that could care for him, or at least until the kind professor returned to town and saw him escape with some pieces of bread from a storekeeper, right away the professor grabbed the kid, and offered to pay for the stolen bread. This is how the two of them met each other and the first day the little kid took a step in the long stair that would be his life.

Although his life had indeed met one of its most fateful encounters, had not done much more than that, after all he was too young and rough for the professor to see in him any spark of the successor he had in mind. But now, it was a different story all together, for he had just turned 18, a young adult vicious as the street had taught him to be, and yet with a mind brilliant enough to be paralleled to that of the very professor. Sadly for him, lacking something important; the passion needed to initiate the journey this story has saved for him.
“ASHCROD!!” yelled a middle-aged man from afar.
“How many times ashcrod?... how many times have I told you NOT to smoke?”
“you are a senior now, you are a model for the younger kids in the institution” said Oak with a mad tone and trying to pry off his hands the midway lit cigarette, but failing to do so as the young man got rid of it himself.
“I’m sorry…I…just needed a quick puff…” said ashcrod looking away from the aged man.
“you what, you have the courage to…”but he couldn’t follow up the scolding as he looked the expression in the boys face “let’s go back, its getting late”, and so the two of them took off back to where the dormitories were.
Although he was like that then, the professor knew that day ashcrod was feeling down for something as he wasn’t his usual badmouthed and rebellious self, so he only walked alongside him until each other reached their respective rooms.
But he wasn’t all that clueless about the boys mood, after he took him under his wing, and started the school, he had always been rejected by the other kids for not having any parents and his vicious behavior, which eventually turned into them calling him “demon”. Ashcrod was grateful for all that professor Oak had done for him, but he couldn’t avoid feeling alone most of the time, after all, they weren’t blood related and that little fact was the stake buried deep within his heart. Being that said he had one and only friend, though not human, I was a different species of living being, which is indeed what ashcrods story is all about, his and that of his peers. This creature had a serpentine figure, covered with scales that gave off a purple shine when in contact with light, and unlike its owner’s sharp and scary eyes, had a pair of deep sparkling eyes that let anyone take a peek into its pure nature. This one along with many others, was part of a race that populated harmonically with humans the planet, and were known as pokect monsters, or pokemon for short; further more this creatures existence were the reason for professor Oaks research and subsequently the first catalyst in the formation of his institution.
This creature he met while in a fight with his classmates. Although his upraising made him incredibly durable, ten boys against one was too much for him to handle and was eventually pushed to the river that flowed into the south sea of kanto, at first the children grinned by how they had finally defeated the demon ashcrod, but those ear to ear grins turned into fear engulfing their faces as they saw that the little boy didn’t come up and was helplessly drowning by their doing, scared of their actions they ran off in fear of confronting the possible accusation of murdering a classmate, a kid, and their own fellow classmate. But amidst the violent waves that pushed his body ashcrod managed to get his head to the surface enough time to scream for help, sound audible enough for a nearby dratini to come to desperately come to his aid. By the end of this event, ashcrod had not only escaped from the ice-cold grasp of lady death but met an invaluable of what he would later consider as his family.
Since then “Hel” as he had chosen to name his new friend lived with him and help calm down the actual demon that was being born in his soul. He never talked to professor Oak about the incident, he wasn’t the type to sulk and cry about his misfortunes and this wasn’t the time to change. The other kids didn’t say anything either, they did repent their actions and felt ashamed but as the years passed towards our actual timeline, those feelings were replaced by the sheer jealousy that caused each and every one of ashcrods academicals achievements, or rather the coldness and indifference with which he was able to outdo any of them, and eventually returned to their hateful relation with him.
The young man stood up from his bed and looked into a nest where his eternally loyal dratini “Hel” laid sleeping peacefully.
“its been awhile since I dreamed of the past” ashcrod said to himself as he dressed in his school uniform completely neglecting etiquette and formality, leaving behind his neck tie and formal jacket, mandatory for the diary activities in campus. He then went on to what he depicted as another day in his boring and meaningless life, on his way to school grounds, prof. Oak was there on top of a stage about to make an announcement, this was something out of his way as he wasn’t the type to do surprise speeches, thus he had everybody intrigued and wondering what it all would be about.
“good morning children, its been so many years since you enrolled in this institution of mine” began his speech “and im happy to see that what I started some years ago is now this wonderful place enthusiastic for the pokemon world”
“and so I would like to announce that today one of you shall become my direct assistant in my most important research as of yet”
As the scientist went on with his speech, everybody felt the excitement of finally being able to make a name for themselves and experience the same glory for which their mentor was known for.
“…you all have the knowledge and the talent, but theres only one think that I need to check and its your prowess as battlers, sure you are scholars but this quest of mine engulfs perils that aren’t fit for the weak, so right now any of you with 17 years or older, is free to battle out and be selected by me”
This was indeed a strange thing for him to say, they spent their days investigating about pokemo, true, but they weren’t experts in the arts of battle, except for a very small group amongst them. Of the whole student body, a lot felt the doubt about going into utter defeat and the selfish action of hurting their pokemon, so excluding those underage and the desperately weak, only 11 stood up to the challenge, as if pulled by fate what once in the past was to become a tragedy, reincarnated as the fight to define again the outcome of their lifes.
“very well, you who forfeited from this don’t need to be ashamed, to know ones limit is also a part of being strong, I hope that you become strong in the near future so that you can join me” this was what the man said, but many of those fearful couldn’t help but regret their lack of guts and willpower to make a stand and face this once in a lifetime opportunity. On the contrary for the fateful 11 waiting, 10 of them were eager to get rid of the other and surpass this challenge that life had put before them. And I say 10, because one of them couldn’t care less abut this.
“I will see you battling but not one by one, the rule for this match will be BATTLE ROYALE, you may start now!!” since ancient times the romans had invented a way to entertain the masses by showing them the confrontation of its best gladiators battling each other at the same time, with only the victor being the last one standing, or alive. Today the professor wasn’t asking for a match to the death, but was in expectation to find the one who could handle the heat of battle and analize through the state of being attacked from every angle.
After his words they all sent out their pokemon, but none of them even grasped the other, desperate as they were to win, they knew they didn’t stand a chance against ashcrod, or not alone at least, so they faced towards the young man who was just there standing gazing at them, the ten pokemon looking at him felt the big pressure that this person could create and for a few seconds were unable to move, until one of their commandants urged them to attack.
“slash him beedrill!!” was the command, after this, the others followed and each gave an order to their respective pokemon, the student mass could only see the scene, ten pokemon; a beedrill, a raticate, a spearow, an ekans, a fearow, a sandsrew, a nidorino, a zubat, a machomp and an electabuzz, all of them heading to ashcrods direction. Despite this he hadn’t backed even one step, instead he waited until the very last second to yell:
“THUNDER WAVE”
After that his serpentine companion jumped from behind his back and emitted a short wave of electricity, which paralyzed the ten pokemon and stopped them on their tracks. The ten scholars, now gladiators to prove their prowess stood there stunned not by the attack but due to the quickness of the movement, they hadn’t realized it but they had been outwitted by ashcrod yet once again.
“what the hell how could you do that, thunder wave is a weak charge of electricity, but you managed to zap all of us, tell me what did you do ”demanded one of them.
“tch tch tch, you know for scientist you sure forget quickly what you just learned, in your attempt to take me down using your numbers you just signed your defeat, although its true that thunder wave its rather weak, the distance is inversely proportional to the energy, in other words the nearer you were, the more effective my wave would be” he wasn’t even flustered nor nervous, hi had read their intentions since the very beginning, but the true effectiveness of this move originated in the fact that Hel, his dratini was never in his pokeball, ever since ashcrod got her, he hadn’t even once put her in one, she was free to roam about him however she pleased.
The professor looked with interest the battle, he recognized the coldness with wchich the boy handled the situation, but it still wasn’t about to end.
“don’t underestimate me, damn it” said the raticate´s owner “use oyur hyper fangs!!” the rodent braced itself and went on to attack the dratini and sank its teeth through its scales, it shrieked in pain and slammed the raticate to the ground to rid itself from the pain. The blood from the creature dripped from its wound and stained the floor and his trainers hand too, as ashcrod went right away to its aid, the wound was the deep, but the dratini was strong and tenacious it made its best to recover a fighting position, dropping to the ground a few times but finally regaining composure.
“now you will pay you bastards” he said in an angered voice “use leer Hel” ashcrod was planning to take his time and lower their defenses to the very minimum, but as he was about to prepare for the final attack, the flaw of his whole strategy surfaced as he hadn’t taken into account the little sandshrew, a grund type that had been unaffected by the paralyzing wave, but in orders of it trainer had hid itself under ground.
“now sandshrew, attack!!” to which the pokemon responded appearing behind ashcrods back and slashing his back cleanly. Once again the blood poured on the floor.
“I guess you aren’t as cunning as you used to be ashcrod, how pitiful you look now” said the trainer as he looked down upon his contender.
“i…will give you the merit of bypassing my strategy, but don’t hope for a single second that you’ve won” he stated coldly and looking from under the locks of his long dark hair “I will show you just what im capable of” with the other pokemon still paralyzed and the sandshrew naively having returned to its trainer said were once again fully exposed to ashcrod once again.
“dispatch them Hel, use your rage!!”
From the little dragons mouth came out a straight ray of pure energy that crashed against the 10 pokemon standing in front of him. With this ashcrod was the last man standing in the arena, not necessarily the toughest battle this young trainer would face, but truly the one that would be responsible for awakening his spirit for pokemon battle.
“you are hurt, hurry up and cure yourself with a potion” said Oak to ashcrod “and the rest of you please help this other ten students, ill visit them later at the infirmary” said to the rest of students that stood there watching.
“ok old man, ive finished with your little game, now tell me what is it you want?” said ashcrod as he was spraying his pokemon with medicine and curing its wounds.
“come with me ashcrod, well go my main laboratory” and he started waling towards the building that was at the very back of the institution.
“what the hell?”said the boy to himself, although he had been taken in by the professor for eight years now, he had never been allowed to enter that building, he didn’t even know that place stood for such a thing, as the professor himself spent must time on the main building by the Oak tree hill.
He finished curing Hel and for the first time he put her in a pokeball, she was exhausted from the fight and needed rest.
When they arrived to the door of the laboratory, prof. Oak looked at ash and analyzed the state in which the boy was.
“im really ashcrod, I didn’t want to put you trough this nor any of the other students, but I needed to make sure the chosen had the true potential. Im not joking when I say this journey includes many perils, beyond this door there are other two trainers chosen by me that are just as capable as you, so please come inside to introduce you all”
Ashcrod was skeptical about the whole situation, but he crossed the door anyways. Inside it was all a real mess, completely opposite of the sparkling clean lab rooms back at the institution.”what is with this old man? Not like you to skip cleaning duties”
“well you see, its been a long time since I myself came here jaja,I only came by yesterday to make some few arrangements….and you know how Mr. mime gets scared of this kind of gloomy places”
After going up the stairs they reached a big room with only a safebox and a few chairs, two of them were being occupied by a boy and girl respectively which seemed to be around the same age as ashcrod, they were looking away from each other but went the two of them entered the both of them glanced at ashcrod and the professor,Oak got ahead and started talking.
“ok now the three of you are here its time to introduce you all, first is this boy” and he pointed the man that was there sitting before ”this is my grandson Aron, he is 18, he returned until recently after he had gone to the johto region” the other two made incredulous faces as they thought the professor was lying, there wasn’t an inch in the boy that resembled the professor in any way
“you gotta be kidding me, you don’t look alike in the very least” said ashcrod as he changed the look of his eyes from Aron to the professor.
“well believe it he is really my grandson” said the professor somewhat irritated.
“jaja don’t get flustered grandpa, you know they always say that” said Aron, he had a gentle voice wich contrasted with ashcrods vulgar tone.
“anyway COUGH COUGH continuing with the introductions, this girl here is Ashley she is the daughter from a friend of mine that lives in the north” the girl had an aloof personality as she wasn’t looking back at neither of the two boys that were looking at her.
“and last but not least, is Aschrod, he has been living with me ever since I came back to pallet town….ok that’s it” the introduction had been really quick and not all that informative, they only knew each other’s name, and they all were thinking about how cynical he was being.
“so this is it, you three were chosen to help in the pokedex project” the three of them then changed to an intrigued expression on their faces “the pokedex is an invention ive been working on since my younger days, basically it’s a digital encyclopedia that records data of pokemon, so I want you to travel kanto and fill this pokedex with information of all the species of pokemon that inhabit this region”
“you…want as to do your job for you?”said ashcrod in a nonchalant way
“wha..”
“ehm grandpa, i actually didn’t exactly get permission from my master to come back, I kinda escaped since you sounded so urgent” said Aron fidgety.}
“Aron?..”
Ashley didn’t say anything but her face didn’t show much cooperation either.
The professor looked disappointed at the three trainers as they weren’t showing one bit of corncern for the issue he was talking about, but soon enough his goofy faced turned into much more of a mad man.
“you kids, how dare you, you were chosen by me to take on this important mission not only for me but for the whole world” he then rushed to the safe that was in the room and opened it revealing three red devices
“behold, this is a state of the art device, it wont miss to record data on any pokemon you encounter, the pokedex” he handed one to each trainer and they all looked at it, not really appreciating the machine for all the praised it was being given.
“its like a….phone…does it have wi-fi?”said ashcrod while opening the little device that had a book like appearance.
“ehm….yes”said Oak ina s somewhat resignated tone.
“oh cool I can surf and stuff”
“really? Show me”
The trainers hadn’t interacted until that time, and the only thing that seemed to make them, was the besides peripherals that the pokedex offered. Not exactly what the professor had in mind but somehow he was refreshed to at least see them making contact.
“okay no more goofing you clowns” and he took out three spheres from his pocket
“you will also receive one of this pokemon to help you throughout your travels, they were carefully analyzed and proved the most efficient at adapting to new experiences”
The trainers seemed significantly more attracted to this statement as they all turned to see their possible new partner.
“they are fire type pokemon charmander, grass type bullbasaur and water type squirtle, choose whichever suits you better”
They kept looking at them for some time until their faces seemed resolved and each reached out to the pokeballs. They didn’t look nor talked to each other but they had an incredible sense of coordination as they all took a different pokeball. Being the charmander for Ashcrod, the bulbasaur for Aron and the squirtle for Ashley.
 
Double-space the paragraphs. It's impossible to read as it is.
 
I cannot read this fic.

Actually, I can read it, but I feel uncomfortable without spaces(then again, I don't use spaces that much in my fic -_-).
 
Please double space Paragarphs. I really cant read it. If you dont nobody will read it.
 
Double space paragraphs. And ensure the use of proper capitalization and punctuation.
 
im really sorry for that!!! please forgive me!!! here it is again....
:blush:

Pokemon undead

As the clouds passed by, the Young man was there just sitting on top of an old rusting desk, besides the biggest tree of the whole town, an enormous oak signature and iconic symbol of the most influent and acknowledged person of the quiet pallet town. But not only was there a hill, with a big tree, but more important was the edifications that surrounded it; fruit of several decades of hard and diligent work from our recognized Prof. Oak, that as warm hearted as he could be, decided to create an institution that could provide education to the otherwise rough children of the town, and also find a successor to one of his biggest researches which sadly hadn’t been nor finished nor announced to the public, although this last one was not something the enthusiastic scientist was about to tell to anyone, as he wanted to watch and see the more promising of them all.


The young one, watching the smoke that came out of his mouth and the tip of his cigarette between his fingers had been part of this institution for quite a while now, even living there as fate hadn’t been the nicest of his friends and left him alone without parents, siblings or a supporting person that could care for him, or at least until the kind professor returned to town and saw him escape with some pieces of bread from a storekeeper, right away the professor grabbed the kid, and offered to pay for the stolen bread. This is how the two of them met each other and the first day the little kid took a step in the long stair that would be his life.


Although his life had indeed met one of its most fateful encounters, had not done much more than that, after all he was too young and rough for the professor to see in him any spark of the successor he had in mind. But now, it was a different story all together, for he had just turned 18, a young adult vicious as the street had taught him to be, and yet with a mind brilliant enough to be paralleled to that of the very professor. Sadly for him, lacking something important; the passion needed to initiate the journey this story has saved for him.


“ASHCROD!!” yelled a middle-aged man from afar.


“How many times ashcrod?... how many times have I told you NOT to smoke?”


“you are a senior now, you are a model for the younger kids in the institution” said Oak with a mad tone and trying to pry off his hands the midway lit cigarette, but failing to do so as the young man got rid of it himself.


“I’m sorry…I…just needed a quick puff…” said ashcrod looking away from the aged man.


“you what, you have the courage to…”but he couldn’t follow up the scolding as he looked the expression in the boys face “let’s go back, its getting late”, and so the two of them took off back to where the dormitories were.


Although he was like that then, the professor knew that day ashcrod was feeling down for something as he wasn’t his usual badmouthed and rebellious self, so he only walked alongside him until each other reached their respective rooms.


But he wasn’t all that clueless about the boys mood, after he took him under his wing, and started the school, he had always been rejected by the other kids for not having any parents and his vicious behavior, which eventually turned into them calling him “demon”. Ashcrod was grateful for all that professor Oak had done for him, but he couldn’t avoid feeling alone most of the time, after all, they weren’t blood related and that little fact was the stake buried deep within his heart. Being that said he had one and only friend, though not human, I was a different species of living being, which is indeed what ashcrods story is all about, his and that of his peers. This creature had a serpentine figure, covered with scales that gave off a purple shine when in contact with light, and unlike its owner’s sharp and scary eyes, had a pair of deep sparkling eyes that let anyone take a peek into its pure nature. This one along with many others, was part of a race that populated harmonically with humans the planet, and were known as pokect monsters, or pokemon for short; further more this creatures existence were the reason for professor Oaks research and subsequently the first catalyst in the formation of his institution.


This creature he met while in a fight with his classmates. Although his upraising made him incredibly durable, ten boys against one was too much for him to handle and was eventually pushed to the river that flowed into the south sea of kanto, at first the children grinned by how they had finally defeated the demon ashcrod, but those ear to ear grins turned into fear engulfing their faces as they saw that the little boy didn’t come up and was helplessly drowning by their doing, scared of their actions they ran off in fear of confronting the possible accusation of murdering a classmate, a kid, and their own fellow classmate. But amidst the violent waves that pushed his body ashcrod managed to get his head to the surface enough time to scream for help, sound audible enough for a nearby dratini to come to desperately come to his aid. By the end of this event, ashcrod had not only escaped from the ice-cold grasp of lady death but met an invaluable of what he would later consider as his family.


Since then “Hel” as he had chosen to name his new friend lived with him and help calm down the actual demon that was being born in his soul. He never talked to professor Oak about the incident, he wasn’t the type to sulk and cry about his misfortunes and this wasn’t the time to change. The other kids didn’t say anything either, they did repent their actions and felt ashamed but as the years passed towards our actual timeline, those feelings were replaced by the sheer jealousy that caused each and every one of ashcrods academicals achievements, or rather the coldness and indifference with which he was able to outdo any of them, and eventually returned to their hateful relation with him.


The young man stood up from his bed and looked into a nest where his eternally loyal dratini “Hel” laid sleeping peacefully.


“its been awhile since I dreamed of the past” ashcrod said to himself as he dressed in his school uniform completely neglecting etiquette and formality, leaving behind his neck tie and formal jacket, mandatory for the diary activities in campus. He then went on to what he depicted as another day in his boring and meaningless life, on his way to school grounds, prof. Oak was there on top of a stage about to make an announcement, this was something out of his way as he wasn’t the type to do surprise speeches, thus he had everybody intrigued and wondering what it all would be about.


“good morning children, its been so many years since you enrolled in this institution of mine” began his speech “and im happy to see that what I started some years ago is now this wonderful place enthusiastic for the pokemon world”


“and so I would like to announce that today one of you shall become my direct assistant in my most important research as of yet”


As the scientist went on with his speech, everybody felt the excitement of finally being able to make a name for themselves and experience the same glory for which their mentor was known for.


“…you all have the knowledge and the talent, but theres only one think that I need to check and its your prowess as battlers, sure you are scholars but this quest of mine engulfs perils that aren’t fit for the weak, so right now any of you with 17 years or older, is free to battle out and be selected by me”


This was indeed a strange thing for him to say, they spent their days investigating about pokemo, true, but they weren’t experts in the arts of battle, except for a very small group amongst them. Of the whole student body, a lot felt the doubt about going into utter defeat and the selfish action of hurting their pokemon, so excluding those underage and the desperately weak, only 11 stood up to the challenge, as if pulled by fate what once in the past was to become a tragedy, reincarnated as the fight to define again the outcome of their lifes.


“very well, you who forfeited from this don’t need to be ashamed, to know ones limit is also a part of being strong, I hope that you become strong in the near future so that you can join me” this was what the man said, but many of those fearful couldn’t help but regret their lack of guts and willpower to make a stand and face this once in a lifetime opportunity. On the contrary for the fateful 11 waiting, 10 of them were eager to get rid of the other and surpass this challenge that life had put before them. And I say 10, because one of them couldn’t care less abut this.


“I will see you battling but not one by one, the rule for this match will be BATTLE ROYALE, you may start now!!” since ancient times the romans had invented a way to entertain the masses by showing them the confrontation of its best gladiators battling each other at the same time, with only the victor being the last one standing, or alive. Today the professor wasn’t asking for a match to the death, but was in expectation to find the one who could handle the heat of battle and analize through the state of being attacked from every angle.


After his words they all sent out their pokemon, but none of them even grasped the other, desperate as they were to win, they knew they didn’t stand a chance against ashcrod, or not alone at least, so they faced towards the young man who was just there standing gazing at them, the ten pokemon looking at him felt the big pressure that this person could create and for a few seconds were unable to move, until one of their commandants urged them to attack.


“slash him beedrill!!” was the command, after this, the others followed and each gave an order to their respective pokemon, the student mass could only see the scene, ten pokemon; a beedrill, a raticate, a spearow, an ekans, a fearow, a sandsrew, a nidorino, a zubat, a machomp and an electabuzz, all of them heading to ashcrods direction. Despite this he hadn’t backed even one step, instead he waited until the very last second to yell:


“THUNDER WAVE”


After that his serpentine companion jumped from behind his back and emitted a short wave of electricity, which paralyzed the ten pokemon and stopped them on their tracks. The ten scholars, now gladiators to prove their prowess stood there stunned not by the attack but due to the quickness of the movement, they hadn’t realized it but they had been outwitted by ashcrod yet once again.


“what the hell how could you do that, thunder wave is a weak charge of electricity, but you managed to zap all of us, tell me what did you do ”demanded one of them.


“tch tch tch, you know for scientist you sure forget quickly what you just learned, in your attempt to take me down using your numbers you just signed your defeat, although its true that thunder wave its rather weak, the distance is inversely proportional to the energy, in other words the nearer you were, the more effective my wave would be” he wasn’t even flustered nor nervous, hi had read their intentions since the very beginning, but the true effectiveness of this move originated in the fact that Hel, his dratini was never in his pokeball, ever since ashcrod got her, he hadn’t even once put her in one, she was free to roam about him however she pleased.


The professor looked with interest the battle, he recognized the coldness with wchich the boy handled the situation, but it still wasn’t about to end.


“don’t underestimate me, damn it” said the raticate´s owner “use oyur hyper fangs!!” the rodent braced itself and went on to attack the dratini and sank its teeth through its scales, it shrieked in pain and slammed the raticate to the ground to rid itself from the pain. The blood from the creature dripped from its wound and stained the floor and his trainers hand too, as ashcrod went right away to its aid, the wound was the deep, but the dratini was strong and tenacious it made its best to recover a fighting position, dropping to the ground a few times but finally regaining composure.


“now you will pay you bastards” he said in an angered voice “use leer Hel” ashcrod was planning to take his time and lower their defenses to the very minimum, but as he was about to prepare for the final attack, the flaw of his whole strategy surfaced as he hadn’t taken into account the little sandshrew, a grund type that had been unaffected by the paralyzing wave, but in orders of it trainer had hid itself under ground.


“now sandshrew, attack!!” to which the pokemon responded appearing behind ashcrods back and slashing his back cleanly. Once again the blood poured on the floor.


“I guess you aren’t as cunning as you used to be ashcrod, how pitiful you look now” said the trainer as he looked down upon his contender.


“i…will give you the merit of bypassing my strategy, but don’t hope for a single second that you’ve won” he stated coldly and looking from under the locks of his long dark hair “I will show you just what im capable of” with the other pokemon still paralyzed and the sandshrew naively having returned to its trainer said were once again fully exposed to ashcrod once again.


“dispatch them Hel, use your rage!!”


From the little dragons mouth came out a straight ray of pure energy that crashed against the 10 pokemon standing in front of him. With this ashcrod was the last man standing in the arena, not necessarily the toughest battle this young trainer would face, but truly the one that would be responsible for awakening his spirit for pokemon battle.


“you are hurt, hurry up and cure yourself with a potion” said Oak to ashcrod “and the rest of you please help this other ten students, ill visit them later at the infirmary” said to the rest of students that stood there watching.


“ok old man, ive finished with your little game, now tell me what is it you want?” said ashcrod as he was spraying his pokemon with medicine and curing its wounds.


“come with me ashcrod, well go my main laboratory” and he started waling towards the building that was at the very back of the institution.


“what the hell?”said the boy to himself, although he had been taken in by the professor for eight years now, he had never been allowed to enter that building, he didn’t even know that place stood for such a thing, as the professor himself spent must time on the main building by the Oak tree hill.


He finished curing Hel and for the first time he put her in a pokeball, she was exhausted from the fight and needed rest.


When they arrived to the door of the laboratory, prof. Oak looked at ash and analyzed the state in which the boy was.


“im really ashcrod, I didn’t want to put you trough this nor any of the other students, but I needed to make sure the chosen had the true potential. Im not joking when I say this journey includes many perils, beyond this door there are other two trainers chosen by me that are just as capable as you, so please come inside to introduce you all”


Ashcrod was skeptical about the whole situation, but he crossed the door anyways. Inside it was all a real mess, completely opposite of the sparkling clean lab rooms back at the institution.”what is with this old man? Not like you to skip cleaning duties”


“well you see, its been a long time since I myself came here jaja,I only came by yesterday to make some few arrangements….and you know how Mr. mime gets scared of this kind of gloomy places”


After going up the stairs they reached a big room with only a safebox and a few chairs, two of them were being occupied by a boy and girl respectively which seemed to be around the same age as ashcrod, they were looking away from each other but went the two of them entered the both of them glanced at ashcrod and the professor,Oak got ahead and started talking.


“ok now the three of you are here its time to introduce you all, first is this boy” and he pointed the man that was there sitting before ”this is my grandson Aron, he is 18, he returned until recently after he had gone to the johto region” the other two made incredulous faces as they thought the professor was lying, there wasn’t an inch in the boy that resembled the professor in any way


“you gotta be kidding me, you don’t look alike in the very least” said ashcrod as he changed the look of his eyes from Aron to the professor.


“well believe it he is really my grandson” said the professor
somewhat irritated.


“jaja don’t get flustered grandpa, you know they always say that” said Aron, he had a gentle voice wich contrasted with ashcrods vulgar tone.


“anyway COUGH COUGH continuing with the introductions, this girl here is Ashley she is the daughter from a friend of mine that lives in the north” the girl had an aloof personality as she wasn’t looking back at neither of the two boys that were looking at her.


“and last but not least, is Aschrod, he has been living with me ever since I came back to pallet town….ok that’s it” the introduction had been really quick and not all that informative, they only knew each other’s name, and they all were thinking about how cynical he was being.


“so this is it, you three were chosen to help in the pokedex project” the three of them then changed to an intrigued expression on their faces “the pokedex is an invention ive been working on since my younger days, basically it’s a digital encyclopedia that records data of pokemon, so I want you to travel kanto and fill this pokedex with information of all the species of pokemon that inhabit this region”


“you…want as to do your job for you?”said ashcrod in a nonchalant way


“wha..”


“ehm grandpa, i actually didn’t exactly get permission from my master to come back, I kinda escaped since you sounded so urgent” said Aron fidgety.}


“Aron?..”


Ashley didn’t say anything but her face didn’t show much cooperation either.


The professor looked disappointed at the three trainers as they weren’t showing one bit of corncern for the issue he was talking about, but soon enough his goofy faced turned into much more of a mad man.


“you kids, how dare you, you were chosen by me to take on this important mission not only for me but for the whole world” he then rushed to the safe that was in the room and opened it revealing three red devices


“behold, this is a state of the art device, it wont miss to record data on any pokemon you encounter, the pokedex” he handed one to each trainer and they all looked at it, not really appreciating the machine for all the praised it was being given.


“its like a….phone…does it have wi-fi?”said ashcrod while opening the little device that had a book like appearance.


“ehm….yes”said Oak ina s somewhat resignated tone.


“oh cool I can surf and stuff”


“really? Show me”


The trainers hadn’t interacted until that time, and the only thing that seemed to make them, was the besides peripherals that the pokedex offered. Not exactly what the professor had in mind but somehow he was refreshed to at least see them making contact.


“okay no more goofing you clowns” and he took out three spheres from his pocket


“you will also receive one of this pokemon to help you throughout your travels, they were carefully analyzed and proved the most efficient at adapting to new experiences”


The trainers seemed significantly more attracted to this statement as they all turned to see their possible new partner.


“they are fire type pokemon charmander, grass type bullbasaur and water type squirtle, choose whichever suits you better”


They kept looking at them for some time until their faces seemed resolved and each reached out to the pokeballs. They didn’t look nor talked to each other but they had an incredible sense of coordination as they all took a different pokeball. Being the charmander for Ashcrod, the bulbasaur for Aron and the squirtle for Ashley.
 
I'll just do the first paragraph for now.
Pokemon undead
First, it should be "Pokemon Undead. If it's in your title (even the title of a chapter), it should be capitalized)

As the clouds passed by, the young man was there, just sitting on top of an old rusting desk, besides the biggest tree of the whole town: an enormous oak signature (?) (why is it a signature?)and iconic symbol of the most influential and acknowledged person of the quiet Pallet Town. But not only was there a hill, with the big tree, but more importantwere the edifications that surrounded it; fruit of several decades of hard and diligent work from our recognized Professor Oak, that as warm hearted as he could be, decided to create an institution that could provide education to the otherwise rough children of the town. He also sought to find a successor to one of his biggest researches projects, which sadly hadn’t been neither finished nor announced to the public, although this last one was not something the enthusiastic scientist was about to tell to anyone, as he wanted to watch and see the most promising of them all.

Most of the other paragraphs look like this. One thing about this that annoys me are your sentence lengths. While long sentences are sophisticated, many of your sentences are just too long.

But not only was there a hill, with a big tree, but more important was the edifications that surrounded it; fruit of several decades of hard and diligent work from our recognized Prof. Oak, that as warm hearted as he could be, decided to create an institution that could provide education to the otherwise rough children of the town, and also find a successor to one of his biggest researches which sadly hadn’t been nor finished nor announced to the public, although this last one was not something the enthusiastic scientist was about to tell to anyone, as he wanted to watch and see the more promising of them all.
Seriously. We go from the pretty tree to Oak's secret experiment in a single, albeit stretched out sentence. That's a bit too excessive. It wouldn't hurt to use three or four sentences to describe that.

I suggest writing your sentences in a Word Processor- it would help a lot with grammatical and spelling errors. You seem to be doing well with spelling, but you've got some grammatical and capitalization errors.

I mostly skimmed through the rest of the chapter for the sake of a decent review, and I've been wondering: why do all of the three kids' names begin with "A"? Also, for Aron, do you mean Aron the steel type Pokemon or Aaron, the boy's name? That part confused me a bit.

Aschrod's got a Dratini (notice how the "D" in Dratini is capitalized, also), so why would Professor Oak need to give him another starter Pokemon?

I suggest adding some more description. What do your characters look like? All I know about Aschrod is that he smokes. Is he young? Do cigarettes even exist in this dimension? What does he look like? The same goes for (A)Aron and Ashley. We know that (A)Aron is 18, but that's it.

Altogether, you've got a good deal to fix up in this fic, but with some work, you might have a good chapter going here. I suggest, again, to write it out in a Word Processor first before posting a chapter here.
 
Muffins! thanks a lot!!!! im a newbie with this, it helps a lot that you took the time to read it all and told me my mistakes, to answer to your questions....well i guess the name should be Aaron then ( i had no idea it had double a :S), and the names starting with A.....they just popped in my head....also i know i did a poor job at describing but i guess its all beacuse i wanted this to be a manga.....
once again thanks a lot, ill work on it
 
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