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Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (OMA Chapter 16 up!)

Falconwing

The Greatest Pokémon Ranger
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Explanation Below
Hey guys. Okay, so I had an idea today while mowing the lawn (don't ask) to once again take a stab at fanfic writing. So, I've decided to tell my version of the events of HeartGold and SoulSilver. However, like Gastly's Mama's Rivals Story, a fanfic I recommend reading, I want to tell it from the side of Silver, the son of SPOILER! innavoiG END SPOILER! Really, that's not much of a spoiler anymore, but I know I'll get flack if I don't spoil it somehow. Please note that this will be a plot point. A major one. If you do not want to be spoiled (because for some reason you do no know this) then please do not read until you do know what I'm talking about.

Now, please note that I am not going to be following the games and their dialogue word for word. In my opinion that is restricting and doesn't allow me much room to create a unique character. There will be events in this story that never happened in the games, or if they did, they are either never mentioned or are vaguely alluded to. I will not create my own characters. I will use the dozens that are left to me. I will possibly change these characters from what the game sets them as. Worst case scenario: Irwin is not a crazy stalker.

Anyways, I'm not going to post the first chapter here. I will wait about 3 hours and then post the first chapter. Below this large wall of text will be links to every chapter, even the first one which will no doubt be on this page.

I will try to update regularly, but I cannot promise anything. I am a busy person and my writing is limited only by my creativity and ideas. Should I unfortunately suffer writer's block, expect this fic to take a short hiatus as I try to piece things together again.

Now, if anyone has actually read all of this... congratulations.

3 hours from now the first chapter goes up. I hope before then to get some feedback from the readers and writers here in the workshop on the idea, but if not it isn't the end of the world.

Oh, and one last thing. Ethan and Lyra will keep their names and the story will run as if Ethan were chosen as the main character. Silver, however, in all feeble attempts to be realistic, will be given a different name. I've decided on Dante to go with the Italian theme.

SonofEarth-RivalsTaleSequeltoRiv-2.png

Done by Instrutilus

THANKS TO BLAZAKING EX FOR THE PICTURE AT THE TOP


CHAPTERS​

Chapter 1 is below
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16


SonofEarth-RivalsTaleSequeltoRiv-2.png

By Instrutilus​


Sorry I'm late. Family matters....

Okay, let's start Chapter 1...
CHAPTER 1​

Yesterday had been an ordinary day. The sun rose. The wind blew. The Pokemon ran through the grass outside the house. And Dante Argento would stand in the doorway and look in the direction of the Johto region and think back to the night three years prior when his father had left him for that region, never to return. Like every day before that Dante would clench his fist and grit his teeth and shout loudly that he was not weak and that he would some day become the greatest pokemon trainer in the world. Then Arthur would walk by, look at him, and then Dante would spend the rest of the day staring in the direction of Johto.

Dante Argento was not an ordinary eleven year old boy. He had not pokemon, he had no family, and he had a secret he could never tell anyone, a secret that constantly tore at his heart and caused to rage and cry. Dante Argento was the son of one of the most wanted men in the history of the Kanto Region, Giovanni Argento, the once mighty head of the nefarious Team Rocket and gym leader of Viridian City. Three years ago when Dante was only eight years old his father had abandoned him and his mother in order to go train in secret. Giovanni would not return until he was certain he could defeat his nemesis, a now fourteen year old child named Red who had somehow managed to topple the greatest criminal empire in Kanto history.

Then Dante's mother Ariana left him to search for her husband. This was how at the age of eight Dante Argento had to flee for his life from the police and bounty hunters of Kanto, alone and scared, until he reached the Tohjo borderlands. It was there that he ran across a small family, the Weeks. They were a family of seven who took him in and sheltered him and provided everything he could ask for. In truth is wasn't a bad life. A roof over his head, a bed to sleep in, Dante had it all. But it wasn't enough. What Dante wanted more than anything was to make up for his father's weakness.

Giovanni had abandoned his family, his dream, and his empire to save himself. For the first year of his exile Dante thought his misfortune to be Giovanni's fault alone. Then he began to realize that it was the incompetence of Team Rocket themselves and the fact they failed to serve their boss that led to all this grief. Dante had long since named his anger and frustration. Proton. Petrel. Archer. And Ariana, his mother. Yes, she too had failed Giovanni. She too had been incompetent and surrendered to a child from Pallet Town.

Today was going to be different.

It was a rainy day. Not that Dante cared. He wouldn't be in the rain at all. He got up, combed his red hair, put on his black clothes, and then approached his adoptive family, the Weeks.

Monica, the eldest, spoke first. She gave only advice. "Remember, Dante," she said softly. "You are on a quest to prove yourself. But do not lose yourself in the process. Trust in yourself, and trust in your pokemon."

Tuscany gave him his trainer card. "Hold on to this with your life. A trainer card is an important document and we can't afford to replace it if your lose it." That was Tuscany for you. Always trying to act like his mother, always giving him warnings.

Wesley just gave him a clap on the shoulder. "Dante man, you are gonna be a star. Remember the training we had together and you're gonna go far." Wesley laughed at his little rhyme.

Arthur gave him his old Pokedex. "I can't imagine you using this very much, but you never know when a pokedex will come in handy." Of the seven, Arthur was the one Dante didn't get along with at all. The two just did not click.

Frieda gave him a lunch and said, "We'll be around the region from time to time. Look for us in the usual spots if you need help."

Santos said nothing. He just handed Dante the Sneasel he had caught last year. Dante grinned. This was the best gift of them all. Sneasel was a very fast, very powerful pokemon of the dark and ice types. Dante was going to train it to be the strongest it could be. He hadn't started yet, but Dante knew when training started Sneasel would quickly learn or suffer the consequences.

Sunny tugged on Dante's arm. "Don't leave. We'll miss you."

Dante threw him off. "I'll be passing through Ecruteak eventually. No need to get all whiny. We'll see each other again."

Sunny stifled a tear. "You're right. I'll be strong like you told me."

Monica opened up the cellar door. "Now Dante," she said, ever as motherly as Tuscany, "Remember. Go through the door in the cellar and follow the tunnel until you reach the train tracks. Go up the stairs and follow the tracks west towards Johto. Once you get to New Bark Town, get off there. The Magnet Train isn't running right now, but do not push your luck."

Dante interrupted her. "I already know this. You've been telling me it over and over again. I can take care of myself."

Welsey spoke up, "We know you can Dante, but we worry about you. Three years you've been with us, practically becoming our eighth sibling. We love you man, like family. So, like family, we're supposed to watch out for you."

Dante just nodded. "I understand," he said sharply, "but I'll be fine. I can't prove to the world I'm strong if I have everyone babying me. I'm not a child anymore. I'm eleven years old."

Tuscany smiled and rubbed Dante's blood-red hair. "Oh, we know. We know." She hugged him, continuing," Just remember: stay strong, be tough, trust no one. And if you can handle that-"

Dante finished, "-then I won't have any problems at all. I know."

The family said their goodbyes and Dante walked into the cellar and through the door. He didn't stop and look back. This was his moment to leave his old life behind. If he stopped, even for second, he be weak and be unable to continue. Even though the tunnel was dark he must continue.

After what seemed like hours Dante found the stairs leading up to the surface. Swiftly he climbed them and threw open the door. The rain had stopped and the sun shone bright and clear, a good omen. Grinning, Dante started walking down the tracks of the Magnet Train. New Bark Town was only a couple miles away. He'd be able to make it long before dark, and when he arrived he would begin training his Sneasel. From there it would be to Cherrygrove, then Violet and on and on. On to the Indigo League and the Championship.

Dante stopped and stared at the majesty of Mt. Silver reflected in the sunlight. He said, loud and clear for all of nature to hear, "Father, I am not weak. I will not give in. Today I begin my quest to being the greatest trainer of all time, and when I have finished that quest you will see that you were wrong and I was right. You are weak. You are a failure. And then you will admit your mistake and you and mother will return. And then we can be a family again. I'm doing this for you Father." Dante stopped and turned his gaze south towards the distant roar of Tohjo Falls. "Everything I do from this next step on will be done for you." And with that next step, the journey of Dante Argento, son Of Giovanni, had begun.

END CHAPTER 1​

***

So, feedback. Good? Bad? Anything need improvements?
 
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Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

I must say I had a good laugh upon reading Dante's surname, considering its given meaning and all. xD Having Ariana and Gio paired up was unheard of, but it makes a some sort of weird sense. Story-wise, I've honestly not played HGSS as of yet, so I'm reviewing purely based on the story itself regardless of its link to the game. Bearing in mind that this is only the first chapter, I will not comment on much, however I will say that you show promise and there aren't any glaringly horrible mistakes to nitpick on as far as I can see.

All in all, this is looking good, and I'll be waiting for the next chapter. :)
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

Thank you. Actually, in the early months of the HGSS speculation a lot of people saw similarities between Mars and Silver (the hair) and I always got a laugh out of that, but then we saw Ariana in a trailer and the theory changed that Giovanni was sleeping with his executives, so I figured, "Why not?" I have a plan for when Silver and Ariana meet.

Also, everyone note that the Week Siblings WILL BE recurring characters.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

Ah, I saw the Mars coupling, but not Ariana's. Supposing to shrug that off to my ignorance. But either way, though, it'll be interesting to see Silver and Ariana reunited.

Heh, as soon as I registered Week, and seven family members altogether, my mind instantly assumed that you would have blatantly introduced everyone as "Mon, Tues, Wed" so on, so forth... so I'm glad that you didn't. xD It's nice how all the names have subtle hints in them, though, or is that just me looking at the screen for far to long and simply making random assimilations in my head?

Because I noticed:
Monica
Tuscany
Wesley
Arthur
Frieda
Santos
Sunny
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

Those are actual in game characters.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

It looks good, I'll say a bit more when the story progresses. It sounds interesting though, that's for sure. There are only a few typos but only a few. Nothing is too big. I like how the characters have those personalities. It does the story good. I'll say more of my opinion later on... Sorry if this wasn't much help...
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

It's fine. I'm getting the second chapter finished now... surprised no one has questioned the Sneasel yet... :p
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale

Yay, people actually bothered to read this. I'm so happy!

Okay, chapter two. Or the beginning of the game. Which brings a question to mind. Are you a boy or a girl? :p

CHAPTER 2

When you think of Johto, you think of sprawling Goldenrod, historical Ecruteak, the majestic peaks of Mt. Silver, the mysterious Dragon Clan of Blackthorn. You think of the dangerous Whirl Islands, the lighthouse of Olivine, the gigantic Lake of Rage. When you think of Johto you think of all of these places and more.

You do not think of quiet little New Bark Town on the southern coast.

When Dante could see the rooftops of the village from his spot on the rails, he jumped onto a branch of a nearby tree and climbed down. When he was little his father would take him bug catching in the Viridian Forest and Dante had gotten really good at tree climbing. Of course, this tree was taller and older, but Dante managed to make it to the ground. The canopy so far above his head now blocked out much of the sunlight.

Dante walked for a few minutes in silence, lost in the thoughts of his journey and the pokemon he wanted to raise and how he felt they could be trained best. He knew he wanted an Abra. He could just picture the look on his father's face when he, Dante, managed to topple the champion with a pokemon that slept most the day. Dante knew he could make the psychic type so powerful. Oh, he couldn't wait to begin training. All his life the Weeks had talked about how fun it was and now here he was, about to realize his dream.

"You lost?"

Dante sprang against a tree in fright. He hadn't noticed the blond man approaching from down the trail. Composing himself, Dante put on his best tough face. "No. And what's it to you if I am? I can handle myself. I'm not a wimp."

The blond guy held up his hands, "Easy kid. I didn't mean anything by it. You just looked lost."

"Well, I'm not. I've got a strong pokemon and I can beat you in a battle to prove it!"

The blond guy raised an equally blond eyebrow. "A battle, you say? Sorry, I don't battle. I'm a collector. The name's Kirk. Leonard Kirk."

Dante's tough act slipped a second as he considered actually talking to this strange man who didn't like battling. Holding out his hand, Dante said, "Uh, I'm Dante. Dante... Smith." He mentally cursed his inability to improvise. That was a sign of weakness.

Kirk grinned and shook. "Well Dante, where is it you're headed? If you want I can travel with you, show you the way."

The offer was tempting. Dante did want to make certain he found New Bark. Throwing on the tough face again, he replied, "Well okay. But don't think I'm accepting because I'm weak. I'm not. I'm going to New Bark Town and I'm guessing you are too." He paused, "You are, right?"

"I am."

"Then it's just for convenience."

Kirk sighed, "You don't have to be rude to prove you're tough kid." Kirk started walking in the direction of New Bark, "Well, sun's burning out and we have a ways to go."

Dante's facade dropped altogether and he sprinted after the collector.

***

"So, Dante," Kirk said. "You say you've got a tough pokemon."

"Yeah. Want to see it?"

Kirk nodded. Dante knew he could prove how tough he was and he cried, "Sneasel, out." The dark type with razor sharp claws and red feathers sprang from the tiny ball in a burst of light. Dante felt pride. This was his pokemon and it could beat anything this Kirk guy had.

Kird circled the Sneasel, which was doing its best to look as tough as it could. For a Sneasel, that wasn't very hard. You can't help but admire its lethal look. The collector muttered to himself every couple steps. Smiling, Kirk turned to Dante and said, "Well, I am impressed. It's obvious you've trained this pokemon very well."

Dante looked confused, "but I haven't trained it all."

Kirk shared his surprise. "At all?" Dante nodded. Kirk continued pacing. "Then," he said, "this is a very fine specimen. A Sneasel of the top percentage I'd say. Impressive. Most impressive..."

Dante checked his watch. It was getting on five o'clock and he didn't want to be stuck in this forest at night. Clearing his throat, the crimson haired trainer said, "Kirk, we do have places to be."

"Ah, yes, of course." Gathering himself, Kirk once again set off down the trail. Dante returned Sneasel to its ball and raced after him. When he got there Kirk said, "I have a shuckle myself. Incredibly defensive. It and Sneasel are like two side of the same coin. A wonderful pair. Oh, if only... Hmm." Kirk lapsed into silence and they walked some more.

A half hour later the duo reached New Bark Town. It was still fairly light out and Dante could see a young girl and her marill running around town. The marill crashed into a young boy as he came out of his house. Laughing, the three ran off downtown together. Dante shook his head. These two were old enough to be trainers. They should be training, not having fun.

"Well, Dante," Kirk announced, "This is where we part. I have to get on a boat to my home of Cianwood and I don't want to be late. So, for now, good-bye."

Dante nodded. "Later," he said gruffly.

Kirk laughed, "Ah, still tough as ever. Well, then this shouldn't bother you too much," and then the blond collector punched Dante in the face, knocking him down.

As he felt consciousness slipping away, Dante heard his attacker say, "It's for the good of my collection." And then darkness and silence pounced on the fallen trainer and he knew no more.

When he came to, it was almost dark and Dante was still on the ground at the edge of the woods. He had a headache like he'd never had before and his clothes were covered in dirt. Hissing, a very enraged Dante grabbed at his belt and said, "Sneasel! Out! We need to track that guy."

But Sneasel didn't come out. There was nothing for it to come out of. Dante was faced with the grim realization that Sneasel, his only pokemon, his only protection, was gone. Stolen.

And once again, Dante was alone.

END CHAPTER 2

Show of hands. Who saw that coming?
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 2 UP)

I did... Collectors always haft to take someones pokemon... Anyways it was interesting. We learned a few more things about the main character, which is good. You also did quite good with the grammar! :thumbup: I like it so far, again I leave you with not much... But how do the characters look exactly? Just a question, I most certainly like how this story is going though!
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 2 UP)

Oh... I didn't want to focus to much on the characters because, well, they're from a video game and a much better artist than me drew them out. So I figured people'd just look at the pictures and make the connections. If you think I should go into full on descriptions I can.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 2 UP)

You know, whenever I post a chapter, I always fear that I'll get called on double posting. You what that mean? We need more readers.

CHAPTER 3

Dante stood at the edge of the woods, mouth open, silver eyes wide. His earlier dreams of glory and training were taken from him in a single punch. He was stuck in a small, backwater town with not a pokemon to help him. And, as he soon discovered, the blond bastard had also taken his lunch, so he no longer had any food.

The sun was vanishing quickly. Dante needed to find a place to spend the night. He quickly walked over to the nearest house and knocked on the door.

A young woman with black hair and a red uniform answered. She was obviously a Johto Ace Trainer, some of the best amateur trainers in the land. Dante had met the Kanto version when he lived with the Weeks. He hoped that the Johto strand was just as friendly.

The woman looked at him, "Hello? Are you lost?" Her concern was genuine, but Dante cringed. He hated asking help. He felt inferior and powerless. Of course he was. And that made it worse.

Gathering what little confidence he still had, he asked, "Would it be to much trouble if I stayed here tonight? I was attacked and my pokemon was stolen." Well, he might as well go jump into the bay now. He was officially the most pathetic person in the region.

But the Ace Trainer smiled. "Of course. Of course. It is a trainer's duty to help their fellow man... or woman." She laughed. "Don't feel bad. I'm sure if you report it to the police they can find your pokemon."

The police. Dante could never go to them. He hated them, almost as much as he hated Team Rocket, his parents, and that stupid Red. They too had been a part of the equation that brought him this misery. But he couldn't say that. What he said was, "Yeah, I'll do that tomorrow." Not a chance.

The woman, who name was Lizzie, showed him his small room. He nodded and thanked her. It wasn't a five star hotel, but it would work for tonight. He sat on his bed and stared out the window. The town was small, smaller than he had even thought. Only a handful of houses and then a large building on the edge of the woods. He couldn't even see the police station he was supposed to go to.

Lizzie came in sometime later and asked if he was hungry. Dante said he was. He thanked her, which was a major compliment from him. Thank yous were not often used by an Argento, but this was a special case. If Dante wanted to keep this roof above his house, he should at least show some gratitude.

Dinner was fruit, salad, a fruit salad, and large loaf of bread. Hoenn brand it seemed. The best kind. The meal was very good and afterwards the two sat on the couch and listed to the radio play some music.

After some time, Dante asked, "Lizzie, what is that large building in town?" All night that building had puzzled him. He felt he should know what it was, but that memory stayed well hidden.

Lizzie turned. "The lab? Oh, that's where Professor Elm lives. He's amazing. Did you know Pikachu is an evolved species? It was the professor who discovered that." she stared at the ceiling and sighed. "Oh, what I wouldn't give to work with him. He gets to spend all day in his lab, studying rare pokemon and how they evolve and such. Professor Elm knows everything about evolution. Did you-"

Dante cut her off. "Did you say he spends every day studying pokemon?"

"That's right. He recently got three really rare ones. I particularly like Totodile. It's blue and so, so cute. But at the same time, it's tough."

Dante considered this. A Totodile sounded right up his alley. A pokemon that looked weak, but secretly had amazing power. Yes, that was incredibly devious. Perfect. "Where could I get a Totodile like that?" he asked.

Lissie thought a while, "Well, I don't know really. They're really rare you know. You could ask the professor I suppose, but he probably wouldn't let you have it. He needs them to study."

Dante couldn't contain his disappointment. "But I need a pokemon. I don't have any now. If I could just get a Totodile or anything from the Professor, I could continue my journey to becoming the greatest trainer ever!"

Lizzie patted his head, like he was some child, "Everyone has that dream Dante, but maybe you can get a neighborhood trainer to catch you a Rattata or Sentret. Try Lyra Christianson . She always keeps spare pokeballs and she's always so helpful. I'd do it too, but I don't have any pokeballs." She giggled, embarrassed.

Dante erupted. "You don't get it! I need a strong pokemon! Rattata! Sentret! Weak! Weak, weak weak! I can't have weak pokemon, or I'll look weak! Do you want me to look weak?"

"Well, no-"

"Then help me get a strong pokemon. You know the professor. Ask him if I can borrow one."

Lizzie shook her head. She said, "I can't do that Dante. He's a very important person. He needs to study those pokemon. I'm not going to interfere with that research."

Dante glared, his silver eyes piercing Lizzie with Gyaradosian force. "You just don't understand. Just don't understand." He stormed to his room and shut the door. He could hear Lizzie sigh in the living room.

Dante lay on his bed. The moon rose and fell in the sky. He started crying to himself as his dream began to slip away. His mind worked overtime, trying to find someway to continue his quest. Finally, in the early hours of the morning, Dante had an idea. His pokemon had been stolen from him. Now he needed a pokemon to replace it.

That was it. There was no option. If Professor Elm would not give him a pokemon, then Dante Argento would, like his father before him, steal the pokemon from him. It was petty. It was wrong. It went against everything Dante believed in. He didn't want to become Giovanni Jr., but there was no choice. That day, when the first opportunity presented itself, he was going to continue his journey to become the very best, and he would have a stolen pokemon at his side to help him.

"Arceus have mercy on me." he muttered. Then he fell asleep.

END CHAPTER 3

Is Gyaradosian a word? No? It is now.

Well, there you have it. Review.
 
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Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 2 UP)

This is really Gold. I mean Ethan. I mean Silver. I mean Dante. Well, you understand. I'll keep reading this because it's really pleasent to read it. I'm expecting how will Dante steal Totodile from Prof. Elm.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 2 UP)

LOL. I wanted to use real names, save Red and Blue (which apparently are real names). Anyone catch Lyra's last name?

Also, I've already started the theft bit. I'm rather proud of the bit leading up to it.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 3 UP)

Those are actual in game characters.
So basically, I simply stared at the screen far too long for my own good. Delightful.
When you think of Johto, you think of sprawling Goldenrod, historical Ecruteak, the majestic peaks of Mt. Silver, the mysterious Dragon Clan of Blackthorn. You think of the dangerous Whirl Islands, the lighthouse of Olivine, the gigantic Lake of Rage. When you think of Johto you think of all of these places and more.

You do not think of quiet little New Bark Town on the southern coast.
Damn you. I nearly spat out my coffee reading the last line. It’s much too true. xD

I must say, I sincerely enjoyed your second chapter, and am kicking myself for not reading it any sooner. You have a great writing style, and although your descriptions may not be epic, they are wonderful enough to be nothing to cringe about. Also, I did not see the end coming. I suppose it could be blamed on my not having the game yet, though, but to each their own.
You know, whenever I post a chapter, I always fear that I'll get called on double posting. You what that mean? We need more readers.
Indeed, I tend to get that feeling as well. So long as you wait at the very least of three hours, then you’re fine.
This is really Gold. I mean Ethan. I mean Silver. I mean Dante. Well, you understand.
Twice in five minutes. It’s as if you guys don’t want me to finish my drink. D:<
Dante couldn't contain his disappointment. "But I need a pokemon. I don't have any now. If I could just get a Totodile or anything from the Professor, I could continue my journey to becoming the greatest trainer ever!"

Lizzie patted his head, like he was some child, "Everyone has that dream Dante, but maybe you can get a neighborhood trainer to catch you a Rattata or Sentret. Try Lyra Christianson . She always keeps spare pokeballs and she's always so helpful. I'd do it too, but I don't have any pokeballs." She giggled, embarrassed.

Dante erupted. "You don't get it! I need a strong pokemon! Rattata! Sentret! Weak! Weak, weak weak! I can't have weak pokemon, or I'll look weak! Do you want me to look weak?"

"Well, no-"

"Then help me get a strong pokemon. You know the professor. Ask him if I can borrow one."

Lizzie shook her head. She said, "I can't do that Dante. He's a very important person. He needs to study those pokemon. I'm not going to interfere with that research."

Dante glared, his silver eyes piercing Lizzie with Gyaradosian force. "You just don't understand. Just don't understand." He stormed to his room and shut the door. He could hear Lizzie sigh in the living room.

Dante lay on his bed. The moon rose and fell in the sky. He started crying to himself as his dream began to slip away. His mind worked overtime, trying to find someway to continue his quest. Finally, in the early hours of the morning, Dante had an idea. His pokemon had been stolen from him. Now he needed a pokemon to replace it.

That was it. There was no option. If Professor Elm would not give him a pokemon, then Dante Argento would, like his father before him, steal the pokemon from him. It was petty. It was wrong. It went against everything Dante believed in. He didn't want to become Giovanni Jr., but there was no choice. That day, when the first opportunity presented itself, he was going to continue his journey to become the very best, and he would have a stolen pokemon at his side to help him.

"Arceus have mercy on me." he muttered. Then he fell asleep.
That was an awesome scene. Really, it was. You’ve shown restraint and a brilliant sum of simplicity, adding the right amount of emotion without going overboard. I loved it.

In fact I must admit, I’m rather hooked by your story at this point. Continue writing as you are, as I’m quite sure you’ll go a long way. :) On that note, I’ll be eagerly awaiting your next instalment and conversely, you’ve completely revolutionised my vocabulary today. Pokémon-based adjectives like Gyradosian are remarkable.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 3 UP)

Why thank you.

CHAPTER 4

Only a few hours later the sun peaked over the Tohjo mountain range. Dante, accustomed to waking at early hours, popped out of bed immediately. He quickly and quietly slipped into his clothes and shoes and opened his bedroom door. Lizzie had apparently not made it to her bedroom and was sleeping on the couch. For a short Dante considered leaving an apology, but then realized that he had no reason to be sorry. He was going to do this and if started doubting himself he’d never be able to get near the lab.

He slipped out the front door and closed it ever so softly behind him with nothing more then a whispering click. The morning chill was still hanging in the year. Frost glazed the ground and the pale light cast a peaceful light upon the town. Dante was apparently the only one with villainous plans that morning as he couldn’t see a single person anywhere in town. Feeling more confident that he doing the right thing he ran over to the lab. The front door was locked but he’d expected that. So now he just had to find a way in.

The stairs on the far side of the building obviously led into the Professor’s quarters, or at least a different part of the lab that wasn’t connected to the main floor. Otherwise, why put the stairs outside? That left the windows.

Dante chose a window on the left side of the lab. It was large, he could see a machine housing three pokeballs from it, and best of all, the lock was broken. He could go in now. Take the Pokemon before anyone knew.

He almost did just that.

A sound from the front alerted him just as his hands grasped the frame. Quickly, Dante snuck to the corner and peered around. It was the Professor and his assistant.

“I’m telling you Jules, I heard something. And I am not going back to bed until I make sure the lab is safe.”

The Professor entered and Dante moved back to his window. Elm took a quick look around, checked his computer, looked under the table, and then shrugged and sat down. Opening the window a crack, Dante sat down against the wall to listen.

“- as well get to work early. Okay, so Professor Birch is supposed to call later today to discuss the transfer of three rare Pokemon from his lab in Littleroot Town. Jules, if he calls and I’m out, please take care to write everything down. I don’t want to play-”

Dante decided there wasn’t much else worth listening to. He continued to sit, waiting for Elm and this Jules guy to leave. He sat for another ten minutes or so before he picked up something else interesting.

Elm was talking. “- Ethan and tell him I need him for an assignment. He’s a good kid. Always so dependable.”

Jules voice sounded for the first time. “What is it you need him for anyways?”

Elm sounded annoyed, like he had said this often before, “I told you, I’m going to let him walk around with one of my Pokemon and do some research for me.”

What? Dante thought. This Ethan kid is going to get a Pokemon without even asking? He decided this wasn’t fair and he would forget all about robbing the laboratory. When this Ethan came out with the Pokemon, Dante would jump him and take it from him. That would show the loser who was more deserving. Dante would have bet anything Ethan already have dozens of Pokemon.

“So this is the Elm Pokemon Lab,” he said angrily. It was such a cruel, unfair place.

“Excuse me, can I help you.”

Bidoof! The kid Dante saw the day before was standing against the corner of the building looking at him. He’d been discovered!

Dante got off the ground. “What are you looking at? Get lost!” He angrily shoved the kid away. The kid, a black haired boy in shorts and about eleven years of age, looked at him funny, then shrugged and went into the lab.

Dante rushed back to the window. Double Bidoof! This kid must be Ethan, the wimp who was going to get Dante’s Pokemon. He clenched his fists in anger. No one, especially not this weakling who preferred play over training, was going to get away with this injustice. That sealed it. Dante was going to steal from him and leave him in the state Dante himself had spent the last evening in.

But wait! Ethan had picked up one the pokeballs and opened it. Out popped a little black and yellow Pokemon with a flame on its back. Dante had no clue what it was but it was clearly a fire type. A plan even more devious than the last began to form. If Dante went with his original plan to steal Totodile, then he’d have the upper hand. Fire types were weak to water types. Dante could chase Ethan all over Johto and harass him with his superior and far tougher Pokemon. It was poetry, a punishment worthy of this wimp who didn’t deserve his Pokemon.

Ethan talked with the scientists a bit more and then walked away. Dante followed him and saw him walking out onto Route 29. Dante didn’t dare follow him now. He had heard terrible stories of trainers who didn’t have Pokemon getting attacked by wild ones. Besides, he now had to figure out, once again, how to get into the lab.

As luck would have it, when lunch rolled around and Ethan was still not back, the Professor announced he was going upstairs for lunch. He invited Jules up and they left together. Dante figured he had maybe twenty or thirty minutes at most to get this over with. Plenty of time.

Lifting the window the red haired criminal-to-be slipped through and stepped down on the linoleum floor. Creeping over to the pokeball machine, Dante examined it from every angle. It was a clever piece of machinery. Dante knew that pokeballs recorded the aura print of the trainer who activated them first and this machine apparently cleared any trace of that print from the pokeball. The two spheres in front of him had no owners now, not even Elm. All Dante had to do was touch one of the balls and lift it out and it was his, no contest.

It didn’t take long for the Dante to find Totodile. He touched one of the balls and a loud, feminine voice said, “Chikorita, the grass-type Pokemon, is in this pokeball.”

Dante pulled his hand away quickly and the voice ended. Carefully, he grabbed the other pokeball, the one obviously containing Totodile, from the tray and pulled it away before the voice could sound again. He stood there for a moment, and then looked at the pokeball in his hand. It was common, a red and white sphere, but Dante could feel the power and strength of the Pokemon radiating from it. It was his, all his, and there wasn’t a damned thing anyone could do about it.

Running gleefully back to his window, he almost missed the sound of the lab door opening. He did not miss the high pitched sound of the girl who opened it.

“Professor, has Ethan come ba- Oh!” She stared at Dante and the pokeball in his hand.

Now he was stuck. Caught. This was over for him. He knew he shouldn’t have done this, but he was too far in to give up. Putting on his meanest glare he growled, “You didn’t see me.” And then he ran right past the girl, out the door, and down Route 29. He never looked back. He was out of that town for good now. He had all of Johto ahead of him.

But first… he had to find Ethan. And crush him.

END CHAPTER 4
 
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Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 4 IS REALLY UP)

I'm lovin' it! I'm not the best person typos wise, but I found none anyway. The story is good, it felt like I was actually there, and I enjoyed the game references.

Possible spoiler?
However, it was a bit disappointing you didn't put Silver having a Dejá Vu sensation or something when meeting Ethan, because if I'm not wrong, during the Celebi event Silver sees him (or Lyra) three years prior to the games time line.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 4 IS REALLY UP)

Pretty good! The chapters could be longer, and the description has room to improve, but nice! I agree with what Ghaskan is saying.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 4 IS REALLY UP)

I was considering that, but as I pointed out in a thread a few months ago, it just didn't seem realistic to have Dante remember a person he saw for three seconds when he was suffering emotional trauma. But I suppose I could make a reference to it later when Ethan actually goes through the event. Ethan would be more likely to remember... Hey, I can use an old one-shot I wrote! Whoo!

Yeah, description is really something I need to work on. I suppose I can't rely to much on the fact this is based off a video game.

As for chapter length, I suppose they could be longer, but whenever I'm writing these chapters they always feel like they go on forever. I promise the future chapters will be longer. The opening bits kinda go by fast.
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 4 IS REALLY UP)

Hmmm. I may not be the best person to actually critically review this, but let me tell you, its not always that I enjoy a fanfic. This was one the very few in which I'll actually be looking forward to the next chapter.

Although I do have a feeling I know when and where and how this collector Kirk is gonna make his next appearance....
 
Re: Son of Earth- A Rival's Tale (CH. 4 IS REALLY UP)

Thanks. And yeah, kirk is really predictable, but I did want to give a sympathetic explanation.
 
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