EVERYONE: - Complete The Night Before Christmas- Epilogue

[Nekusagi]

Since last year's Nekou Christmas fanfiction went over so well, and because Evil Azurill more or less told me to do this, I once again fulfill everyone's needs for holiday-themed Team Rocket fanfiction with this entry into what appears to be becoming a tradition of sorts. It's not required, but it really helps you understand some of the jokes in this story if you read last year's story, The Christmas Wish, so if you're interested, you can go back in the fanfiction archives and read through that one. Another note- I based the format of this story off The Office. If you've never watched the show, a character will occasionally offer commentary after certain scenes, in a sort of confessional scene. The same happens in this story. When there's isolated text in italics following dialogue, it's always the commentary of the character who spoke last. For example, if Nekou said "I like cake" and then you read, on a separate line, I really like cake, that's Nekou adding that yes, she likes cake. And when that text is in brackets, <like this>, it means I'm translating Sneasel or Persian's Pokemon-speak, since there's no Meowth (or magic, wish granting cookies) handy to do the work for me (Example: Kali nodded to Persian. "<I like cake too,>" she said). (Yes, I blatantly ripped that off from Megatokyo. So sue me already.) Hopefully, this should clear things up. Now that all that's out of the way, enjoy the story!


The Night Before Christmas- Chapter 1

"Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a- KALI!" In an office that was really a repurposed broom closet, a girl with brown pigtails and a temper of questionable length swatted away a Sneasel. "Snee..."
"Look, I don't know what you want, Kali, but I'm busy recording this for my boyfriend, okay?" The girl in question was an orphan named Nekou Usagi, the head of Team Rocket's Covert Operations department. And she was not happy. Even for a time of year that was usually quite happy for her. "So just... wait it out, will you?" Kali hissed at Nekou, and pointed to the door behind her. "What? Someone at the door?"

Seriously, these things are annoying, but you know what? Get one, and you NEVER need a doorbell. Or anything. They're real useful, if you can tame them first.

"Nekou? Are you dead or something? Come on, open up..."
Too tired to bother getting up, Nekou shoved her wheeled chair over to the door with a push of her feet and opened the door. "Hitoshi, now is REALLY not a good time. Seriously. Go bother Namba or something."
The dirty blonde haired boyfriend grinned at her, mischieviously. "Heh, I would, but he's not down there. What's eating you, Nekou?"
"Someone figured us out."
"Us?"
"A few people found out Covert Ops is basically in hibernation during the winter months and figured they'd enjoy their holidays at the expense of ours. Does that explain it enough?"
Hitoshi thought for a few moments. "Not really, Nekou."
"Hitoshi, if it wasn't Christmas time right now, I would smack you. I'm in charge of the department, by some great misfortune. And you know what that means."
"...you're planning their Secret Santa?"
Nekou shook her head. "Why do I even bother? Look, since I'M running things, everyone assumes I'm the one to dump any miscellaneous projects on and they might just get done or something." She held up a stack of charts. "I'm supposed to know what these numbers mean, for God's sake... how am I supposed to know that?"
"Looks like an expense report to me," Hitoshi said.
Nekou stared pointedly. "A little holiday sympathy would be nice, Hitoshi. Just saying. Anyway... I don't think I'll be able to do anything for Christmas this year. Not if I want to get this done."
Hitoshi wasn't surprised by what Nekou said in the least. His girlfriend had a history of not being able to say no. "See, that's the problem, Nekou. You feel the need to be nice to everyone, all the time. Why don't you just start telling them to do their own work?"
"If it weren't for the fact they were technically my superiors..." Nekou began, but Hitoshi interrupted her.
"Then why don't you-"
Nekou could tell where this was going. She held up a particularly large folder. "Guess whose THIS is." Hitoshi thanked his lucky stars that moment that Namba didn't give him problems that bad, then searched for the right words.
"Ouch."
"Yeah," Nekou said. "And I'm not going anywhere near that... cat, if you can call it that... if I can help it this year. You remembered what happened LAST year, right?"
"Kali and Persian had snuggle time?"
"People learned life lessons! Hitoshi, do you know how cliched that is? Life lessons, at Christmas? It's so tidy, and greeting card like... and just..." She shuddered in horror. "I promise, Hitoshi, this Christmas will be completely life lesson free. Barring any unforeseen circumstances."

Unforeseen circumstances in this case means bizarre twists, acts of God, or whatever else unusual to a comic effect may be thrown my way. Crap. I'm really screwed, aren't I?

"So what's this have to do with me?" Hitoshi asked.
"Never mind," Nekou said.
"If something's wrong, it's okay to tell me!" Hitoshi replied, leaving before things got thrown.

She really doesn't make it easy to be a boyfriend. I stand there, I listen to her... she bites my head off and treats me like... I don't know, like I'm a Psyduck or something. I mean, someone could learn some gratitude... wait, is this being recorded?


"Did you have to bring this thing?"
Namba made an odd sniffing sound. "Didn't anyone ever teach you to respect your elders?" he asked Giovanni, who was staring at him in annoyance.
"Believe me, I do, or else I would have fired you by now," he replied. "Really, Sebastian, did you?"
"It's a necessary evil. I know better than to leave Namba unattended this close to Christmas, lest we see Project Santa Shoot come into fruition. So I told him to come up here with me."

The problem is that Giovanni respects his elders, and I get stuck putting up with said elders. It's not as easy for me.

"Besides, since he loves the holiday so much, I figured he could give us a unique perspective in planning the party."
Namba glared at Sebastian. "You never told me this 'planning meeting' was about a Christmas party," he complained. "I thought it was about some new project or something!"
"You can't tell me I was lying, Namba. I never said what we were planning. And you were coming up here even if we were planning a singles' bar crawl. Even with the measures I put in place, I'm not leaving you down there alone to have your way with the rest of Research."
"I noticed that moratorium you put on any work involving explosives," Giovanni interrupted.
"Yes, I've learned to take precautions this year," Sebastian said, proud of himself. "Now... before that little interruption, where were we... yes, the party. About that. It's in a day. How are we supposed to plan a whole Christmas party a day in advance? And didn't you have a bunch of paperwork due next week to Wendy?"
"It's taken care of," Giovanni replied. That was almost too easy, in fact. "It really doesn't take much to plan a party when it comes down to it. Put up some trees, leave some food and drinks out, and it's technically a party, right?"
"There's no committee planning the party this year?" Namba asked. "I thought there was always a committee..."
"There was," Sebastian said, "until someone decided to bring eight live Stantler in at the last one. And they were not tiny." He shook his head. They always seemed easy to round up, until you considered their psychic horn powers. "Do you know how much that cost to clean up?"
"-which is why Sebastian and I are planning it this year, Namba," Giovanni finished. "Yes, it seems completely unthinkable, but like I said, a party is just food and decorations when it comes down to it. The invitations have already been sent out, anyway. So we're really committed now. And you're going to help us for once. Instead of causing the Professor problems. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"
Namba groaned. He remembered when Giovanni's mother ran the Team... she never had Christmas parties like this, that was for sure. If anything was getting lit up on Christmas Eve, it was her, and no one ever had anything to say about it... and if he wanted to rid the world of the threat and rival for world domination that was Santa Claus, she kept her nose out of it, and any meddling subordinates who had problems with it would be shut up quickly. He missed those days...
"Well," Sebastian said, "Ambrose?"
Namba's eyes narrowed as Sebastian addressed him, shocking him out of his moment of nostalgia. "Yes, sir," Namba said, in a rare moment of deference. Sebastian smirked at Namba.
"How did you do that?" Giovanni asked Sebastian, in a whisper.
"I found Namba's old files cleaning my office last week," Sebastian said. "Let's just say I learned a few things."

They say if you want power over a person, you learn their name. It really works. Of course, it helps greatly if they have an embarrassing one.


Kali poked at her human with one inquisitive claw. "Sneasel? Snee?" It was clear Nekou was fast asleep at her desk. She'd been forwarded the memo about the Christmas party, and read over it, only to break down in exasperation upon realizing that she was reading the very reason her superiors had decided to dump their spare paperwork on her. Now she was asleep, trying to dream her troubles away... This was good news to the Sneasel, however. At last, her true love was ever closer within her reach... Kali needed a present. She'd seen, in one of the human's fashion magazines, a picture of a Persian trainer, and the Persian was wearing a hand knitted scarf. That Persian looked happy to Kali, at least as far as her little Sneasel mind could tell. And if she wanted Persian to be happy this Christmas, obviously she needed to find Persian a knitted scarf. It just so happened that Nekou, until recently, had tried passing time by knitting. Now her knitting supplies, including a half finished scarf for Hitoshi, sat ignored in what was once Kali's sleeping basket... The scarf, quite conveniently, was only half the size it should be for a human, but just right for a Persian. Kali smiled and purred to herself. While Nekou's Christmas was sucking, one Sneasel was having the best Yuletide of her life.

<Yeah, I know that was for the human's mate, but come on. It's in my bed. MY BED. I have squatter's rights!>

 

[Evil Raichu]

I LOVE IT! Can't wait for more. And this...

If anything was getting lit up on Christmas Eve, it was her, and no one ever had anything to say about it...

...is my favorite line. Awesome. Captured Madam Boss quite well, I think...or at least how I imagined her to be.

 

[Nando]

Oh man, that was awesome. Madame Boss getting lit up on Christmas....awesome.

Sebastian pwning Namba was great too.

 

[Nekusagi]

Sebastian pwning Namba is my way of dealing with guilt from the Baby Lugia episodes.

The image of Madam Boss with a half empty bottle of wine, barking out incoherent orders, is a nice one, no?

 

[Wonder Happiny]

This is a pretty funny story so far.

And Madame Boss drinking and yelling out orders...priceless.

 

[Magma Krystal]

This is a pretty funny story so far.

And Madame Boss drinking and yelling out orders...priceless.

Ditto. I loved this. Can you get a link for last year's story? I've never read that one....

 

[Nekusagi]

http://bmgf.bulbagarden.net/showthread.php?t=16115
there's last year's. Not my best fic in retrospect, especially because I hate how the awkward Giovanni and Nekou scene kinda drags on in Chapter 4 (which is partially why there will be no life lessons this year- I suck writing anything longer than a phone conversation between the two), but still has quite a few laughs. I really should have posted the link to it from the beginning... unless you read my R100 stuff, you're very unlikely to understand that the Persian Kali likes is, yes, Giovanni's. And then, you miss a lot of the absurd humor/satire that runs through all my Nekou stories.

Anyway, here's Chapter 2.



Chapter 2

Nekou opened her eyes. "Wha- what's going on?" A thin, transparent girl floated near her door. The average person would be startled by this. Nekou, however, was not. The ghost in question was one of her colleagues. "Oh, it's you, Yasuka. What are you doing here?"
"Neeekoooou... I bring you a warrrrning..."
"Yasuka..." Nekou said. "I know you're a ghost. I've known that from day one. What're you getting at here?" She rolled her eyes. Yasuka looked only in her early twenties, but in reality, was the ghost of a girl buried for centuries in the cemetery Team Rocket headquarters ended up built upon. When an exorcist was called to remove any spirit problems, Yasuka somehow ended up sealed in the area instead of banished, a result of a spell gone horribly wrong. Adopting the saying "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" quite literally, Yasuka found herself spending a lot of time haunting- er, working in- the attic- which is precisely where the Covert Ops department located their main office.
Somehow, despite her ethereal voice and the fact she floated, rather than walked, Nekou was the only one in the whole department who knew of Yasuka's... differences.
"I really wish you wouldn't call me a ghost, Nekou. The proper term is 'mortally challenged',"

Why does everyone think it's okay to call the spirits of the deceased "ghosts?" I mean, isn't this supposed to be a more enlightened time? Just because we're dead doesn't mean we don't have feelings.

"Now, where was I? Oh, yes... Tonight you will be visited by-"
"Don't tell me," Nekou said. "Three spirits, right? And they're going to tell me to change my ways or something, aren't they?"
Yasuka glanced at the palm of her hand. "Holy Miltank, you're right. How the heck did you know I was going to say that?"
"Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol. The root of all Christmas specials. I read, Yasuka."

Really, something needs to be said for "creative integrity". Instead of constantly borrowing from a pre-existing commentary
on Victorian labor relations, you'd think writers these days could be a little more creative. Find your own stories, you lazy jerks.

"Darn!" Yasuka said to herself. "Er... Heed my words! Or you will become... liiike meee!"
"A wandering spirit, sealed within these walls by a moronic exorcist, and completely cynical? I'm halfway there, then. You can't scare me, Yasuka." Nekou collapsed back onto her keyboard. "Just get it over with, will you?" She raised her head and looked behind her. Yasuka was gone.
"No life lessons," Nekou muttered, as she slowly drifted back to sleep. "No life lessons..."


"So far, we've got food... we've got my department working on the decorations..."
Namba sniffed again. "-A complete waste of their time, if you ask me-" he complained to Sebastian.
"Have you got dramatic sniffing down to an art, Namba?" Sebastian asked. "And if it keeps them from carrying out any instructions you might have left..."
Namba's stomach lurched as he realized that both Giovanni and Sebastian were now staring him down. "Um... what... instructions... would those... be... again?"
"Here's a hint, Namba," Sebastian said. "When you click 'send to all' on your email... it really does mean 'send to all.' We both know exactly what you have in mind.

Sometimes I'm thankful he hasn't quite figured out this Internet thing yet. It makes it that much easier to keep tabs on him.

If you think I'm letting you out of my sight for one moment now until the 26th, you've got another thing coming. As I was saying... music. I'm assuming we've got something better than this... what is this?" he asked.
"Burl Ives? Sebastian, I'm pretty sure he's an institution or something," Giovanni said, once again defending his tastes in music.
"Institution is one word for it," Sebastian said. "My dad listened to this stuff."

Burl Ives isn't even that good. Do you know what Burl Ives is? Burl Ives is like, a cut rate Frank Sinatra or something. It's like you want to buy whipped cream at the store for your pumpkin pie but the dairy case is out of whipped cream and you have to buy dessert topping, when you listen to Burl Ives. Frank Sinatra is the whipped cream, by the way. Oh, and I hate whipped cream on my pie.

"Yes, there's more than this, I'm sure... Can Research just pool their collections together, or something?"
Sebastian grinned again at Namba. "Yes they can. Any way I can keep them busy, right, Namba?"
Namba shrank into his chair. "Right..."
"Of course," Sebastian said, smug with the satisfaction of knowing Namba had been finally put in his place. "Holly Jolly Christmas" played in the background. "What the hell is a 'cup of cheer' anyway?"
"I don't know," Giovanni said, realizing he'd always wondered the same thing. "But I'm pretty confident it has alcohol in it. Namba, go find the egg nog."
Namba blinked. Come to think about it, those two would be a lot easier to convince completely bombed...
"Ambrose..." Sebastian said. "I think you were told to do something..."
Namba shuddered at the mention of his first name, then reluctantly got up to find the beverage. "I'm going," he said softly.

They had to name me Ambrose, didn't they? My parents could have named me something normal, like Mark... or Bill.. or Bob... but no. They had to name me Ambrose.


Persian opened one red eye and perked his ear. The humans were still arguing... it wasn't about to stop any time soon, was it? And as long as they were arguing, they were distracted... The door. How he wished it could only open, so that he could go and see his love... He heard a grumble as the oldest human opened the door. <Yes! It's open!> The cat shot up, ready to dash after him.
"Persian!"
Persian turned his head. His human was talking to him. "What do you think you're doing?"
"<I want to see the Sneasel.>" he replied, knowing his human heard only meows.
"I'm not letting you get lost again," the human said. "Get back here. Look, I've got some milk for you..."
Persian's nose twitched as he smelled the delicious scent of his favorite thing... Curse that human of his, exploiting his weakness. His instinct guiding him, he quickly returned to the human and his dish of milk, purring. "Mrrr, mrrr, mrr," he said, nuzzling his human's leg, hoping for forgiveness. His chance would come...


Nekou whimpered as she opened her eyes. Standing next to her was Kali, poking her.
"Kali... I'm trying to sleep. What're you doing? Why are you glowing like that?"
"Sneasel!"
"Oh. Ghost of Christmas Past, right? What have you got to show me, then?"
Kali waved one claw, and Nekou realized she was back at her first Christmas since her memory had been wiped, two or three years ago. Hitoshi was only a friend to her at that point, and he was trying to explain Christmas to her.
"So," Past Nekou said, "this is a day we all give stuff to each other?"
"Yeah," Past Hitoshi said. "That's about it. It's about giving. And for the most part, we all get the day off."
"Hitoshi!" Past Namba was yelling for Hitoshi in the background. "Get over here! That sleigh isn't going to shoot itself out of the air!"
Nekou giggled to herself. Some things never changed.
"I'm coming, Doctor!" Past Hitoshi said. "Look, the doc wants me to go... help him with his project... so I have to go now,"
"But Hitoshi, I still don't understand this Christmas..." Past Nekou grabbed his hand. "Isn't there more to it than this?"
"Of course," Past Hitoshi said. "Hey, don't worry about it.You're an orphan, right? Everyone's nice to orphans at Christmas. So it should be particularly easy for you."
"HIMARU! Now! Or do I have to drag you?"
Nekou watched as Past Hitoshi finally obeyed Namba's order, and the nervous Past Nekou crept away. "That's it? You showed me this?" she asked the Sneasel, as the scene returned to her office. "I know I don't have that much 'past' to see, but..."
"Sneasel," Kali said. "Sneasel sneasel sneasel."
"Right, right, Christmas Present is next, I know the deal," she said. "Now could you please leave me alone, Kali?"


"Kali?"
Kali dropped the scarf. She hadn't been caught in the act, had she? The end of the yarn was still somewhat connected to the ball, and she was in the process of separating it. "<Lovely scarf you've got there, human,>" she said, putting on her best innocent act. Nekou didn't budge. "<Ah, so you were just talking in your sleep. Fine, fine.>" Kali breathed a sigh of relief. "<You just keep doing your thing, human. Keep doing your thing.>"

<She does that all the time. The things she says in her sleep. It'd be funny, if, you know, I wasn't trying to get some sleep myself.>

 

[Nando]

That.....was....PRICELESS.

I'd totally be against it in real life, but the blatant alcoholism in Team Rocket is hysterical. As is Namba's hatred of Christmas (shooting down the sleigh, lol)

 

[Evil Raichu]

LOL...awesome. Namba forgetting that Sebastian and Giovanni were on his send to all list gave me a chuckle. Seems like something he'd do.

 

[Nekusagi]

That.....was....PRICELESS.

I'd totally be against it in real life, but the blatant alcoholism in Team Rocket is hysterical. As is Namba's hatred of Christmas (shooting down the sleigh, lol)

Come on. What else do you think they do for fun? (Not to mention, I'm pretty sure Giovanni's drinking issues are canon.)

 

[Nekusagi]

(This isn't a double post, I posted that one several hours ago.)
Nekou: Come on, don't you guys have some love for Nekou?
(Really, I figured Sebastian and Giovanni's antics would steal the show, but first and foremost, this is about Nekou. Your thoughts on HER story?)
I normally only post 1 a week, but Christmas is early this year and Ch. 4 is super long. No Epilogue long.


Chapter 3

"I don't wanna talk to anymore ghosts," Nekou muttered, opening her eyes again. "So you're the one playing Christmas Present?"
"Playing? I don't know what you're talking about, but I'm the real deal," Hitoshi said. He, too, was glowing slightly, and munching a large box of Pocky. "The one and only Ghost of Christmas Present."
"Oh, wonderful. Look, I don't care if you are a figment of my imagination-or whatever, Hitoshi- but you don't just walk into my office eating Pocky without offering me some." She reached into the box and took a few sticks. "So, what are you going to show me?"
"Follow me," the ghost said, grabbing her by the hand. "We've got a few stops. Okay, close your eyes... and we're there!"
Nekou and Christmas Present Hitoshi were floating above a room Nekou could recognize instantly. "No way... we're... how'd you do that?"
"If I told you, it'd only ruin the magic," Christmas Present told her. "Look down."
Nekou did so. Giovanni, Sebastian, and Namba were all right where they'd been been the whole evening, still discussing the party. "So they're planning the Christmas party. What's that have to do with me?"
"You're not looking in the right place," Hitoshi said. He pointed at Persian, who was lapping at a bowl of milk, occasionally looking up wistfully at the door.
"Oh, no," Nekou said. "After all the grief that cat has put me through, you expect me to feel sorry for him? Persian as Tiny Tim? Oh, no, Present, or Hitoshi, or whatever you are, let me tell you, that's not going to work. I expect better than that in my holiday cliches..."

Really, now, if Persian's not out of place in the role of Tiny Tim, I don't know what is. For starters, he's not even human.

"The poor kitty only wants to feel loved," Christmas Present said. "And that's hard to come by from any humans right now. I imagine your Sneasel expects likewise," he added.
"I give Kali plenty of love," Nekou said defensively. "Persian's problems shouldn't be mine. I had enough of that last year."
"Ah, but his girlfriend is your Sneasel. And you're denying him that girlfriend. But hey, I report and you decide, so make of that little scene whatever you want. Time to hit the next stop," Christmas Present said, snapping his fingers. They'd moved; they were now above Wendy's head.
"Aaah! Get me out of here!" Nekou said. "I'm not going to try and put up with THAT witch, not now."
"Chill out," Christmas Present said. "She can't hear or see us. Pure astral projection. Go on and get closer."
Nekou floated downward to where Wendy sat at her desk, pencil and book in hand, writing down numbers without stop.
"So? This is what she always did, I thought. It's her job, right?"
"Look closer," Christmas Present told her. Nekou did. They weren't just any numbers... Wendy was working her way through a book of Sudoku puzzles.
"So she likes brainteasers," Nekou said.
"Not really," Christmas Present explained. "But these puzzles are the only thing that can satisfy her addiction to perfect organization. You see, the poor woman's been so busy demanding papers from everyone she's not had any of her own to sort and put in an exact order. She's got withdrawal something fierce."
"And I'm supposed to feel sorry for her. Really, you're not doing your job very well. I could care less about Persian, and I don't think ANYONE cares about Wendy. If you came here trying to inspire me to change, you're doing a really bad job of it. How about showing me something I do care about?"
"Shouldn't you care about me?" Christmas Present asked. "Or rather, the form I took?"
Nekou blushed. "Hitoshi... I wish I could go to the party... but... you know."
"Excuses," Christmas Present said. "It's not too late to do something about it, you know. Well, my time's up. Your next apparition should be here in about an hour. I'd suggest resting up until then."
"Wait! Hitoshi- er... Christmas Present! Isn't there more? I want to see... Hitoshi..." Nekou drifted off again.


Kali licked Nekou's hand. Nekou had been twitching a lot in her sleep, and Kali feared she was having another one of her incidents. Stealing a half-complete scarf for Persian seemed like the least of Kali's worries right now- despite what Nekou might say at times, the Sneasel cared more about her trainer than anything else in the world. "<Human! Are you okay? It's just a dream, human, wake up!>" Nekou half opened her eyes. "Oh, Kali..." she said, then eyed the clock on her computer screen. 12/23, 11 PM. She'd been napping for four hours straight now. "Kali..." she said, closing her eyes again. Kali looked at her, worried. Persian could wait, she decided. Keeping an eye on Nekou was clearly more important right now.

<Of course I care about the human. She took me in, saved my life, she means everything to me. But more importantly, she feeds me.>


"Namba, you said you made this eggnog?" Sebastian asked, as he sipped some out of his mug.
"Yes. It's an old Namba family recipe, passed down from my great grandfather. It's not Christmas without a good nog and rum, if you ask me," Namba said. "Not at all."

If there's one thing my great grandfather liked, it was anything involving intoxicating beverages. I remember going to his house and finding him completely sober. I'll never forget it. My mother almost called the doctor.
He gave us all quite the scare that day.

Giovanni sniffed his mug nervously. "Namba, how much rum is in here exactly? Usually I can taste more nog than rum in my eggnog. It seems the other way around this time."
"I don't know," Namba replied. "I never bother to measure. Exact measures are for the lab, not cooking. Besides, has too much rum ever been a bad thing?"
This comment struck Giovanni as possibly the wisest thing he'd ever heard Namba say. He stared at Namba for a moment in shock.
"No. I don't believe so."

The best thing about Christmas is definitely all the different delicious things to drink. Hot rum, spiced rum, peppermint rum, eggnog with rum... Did I mention I liked rum?


Nekou shivered in her sleep as the final spirit approached in her dream. Part of her wondered what form Christmas Future would take.
Another part of her quickly regretted wondering.
"Get out. Now," she told the shadowy form who now sat in front of her, red eyes glowing eerily. "You're not scary in the least. I thought Christmas Future was supposed to look like Death or something."
A long tail flipped with annoyance under the cloak.
"Oh, I offended the cute little Persian. My bad. Sorry, pal, but Christmas Past is already come and gone. I can't help you."
Nekou couldn't see much under the cloak, but she could tell she was getting stared down.
"You're not leaving till I see what's ahead for me, right?"
Nekou watched two lumps perk up under the hood where the ears would be. A furry end of a tail popped out from under the cloak and started wagging happily.
"Fine. I've always wondered how I'd die, anyway. Please don't let it be eaten by Sharpedo."

Yep. There are few worse ways to die than eaten alive by Sharpedo. Yes, I know they only attack when provoked. That's why it would suck to go that way. Because really, they'd all know then you were a complete idiot. Is that really what anyone wants to be remembered for? "Oh, I recall her, she's the complete moron who went and provoked the Sharpedo, isn't she? Yes, such a tragic loss. XD LOL!"

Christmas Future waved a paw as Nekou closed her eyes in anticipation of a gruesome and painful end. When she opened them, she was looking at... herself.
She seemed quite alive. If you could call it that.
"I'm not dead!" she said, happily, looking around the office. "Let's see where I am then in..." She searched the place for some indication of the date. "...2008. Damn it!" she yelled, noticing the calendar hanging on the wall. "I thought I'd specifically told Hitoshi I DIDN'T like Kitty Kitty Sparkle! Yet here I am, with the wall calendar!"
Christmas Future shook his head as if to say "that's not why you're here" then pointed his front paw at the figure of Nekou one year in the future.
"Hey, that's the same uniform... no promotion, are you KIDDING? Christmas Future really bites, doesn't it... And what's with all the papers... Oh, very funny, buried in paperwork, like Ebenezer Scrooge saw himself buried as well. But cemetery buried, not figurative buried... Buried in paperwork? Please, spirit, tell me this is the week BEFORE Christmas. Please?"
Christmas Future again extended his paw, this time to the screen of Nekou's computer. Another emailed invite to the Christmas party was on her screen, and in the bottom right hand corner of her screen was displayed the date. 12/24.
"NO! Tell me this isn't so!" Nekou said, realizing she was succumbing to the very cliche she so despised. "Tell me it's not too late! Please, spirit!"
Christmas Future, who had been licking his paw, raised his head slightly in curiosity.
"You're right. I am being pretty pathetic, aren't I?" she asked. "But I don't want to spend the rest of my life doing everyone else's work. I want to do Nekou's work. Whatever that is," she added darkly.
Christmas Future stopped to scratch his ear (which was a difficult task through the black cloak, even for a flexible Persian), and waved a bored left paw. The scene in Nekou's office changed instantly, returning to how it looked in the present. Nekou returned to her desk. "Well, thanks for the ride, cat, but I made good on my end of the deal. Now amscray."
Christmas Future sat there, still wagging his tail.
"Oh, right. I forgot about that. Please?"
On cue, Christmas Future vanished from sight. Nekou collapsed at her desk within her dream.
"No more funny dreams now, okay?" she muttered in her sleep. "No... more... ghosts..."
Kali, who was still perched on her shoulder, breathed a tiny sigh of relief as Nekou stopped twitching. She climbed down and curled up in her bed, converted to a knitting basket, and snuggled under the scarf she'd appropriated for Persian. It'd do as a blanket for tonight. And if anyone needed sleep, it was tiny Kali.


"And one more thing," Giovanni slurred to Sebastian. "You know those Christmas lights? The ones in strands? Why d'ya think they say indoor and outdoor use only? Is there any other kind? It doesn't make sense."
"So true, my friend, so true," Sebastian replied. As the night had gone on, the eggnog had flowed freely between the three, and as the eggnog ran out, one of them had decided it would be a shame to let such good rum go to waste. "Namba, you majored in engineering... what do you think?"
"Maybe you want to use them in space? You know, beyond indoor or outdoor?"
The other two paused. "Yeah, horrible thing, Christmas lights in space," Giovanni muttered, barely coherent. "They put Christmas lights in space, it might blow up... rain glass on everyone... who knows, those are just things you never mess around with."
"Yeah, you wanted all that genetic... cloning... stuff..." Sebastian said, his inebriated state prompting him to bring up past missions that he dared not bring up sober.
"Whatcha talkin' bout, Sebastian?"
"...I don't remember," he said, being quite honest. "Forget that, what about that Grinch? Talk about wrong..."
"Oh, that poor misunderstood Grinch, all he wanted was peace and quiet! Noise pollution's a... what is that, Seb, you know, where people get annoyed, and you have to pay money?"
Namba sat, smirking at their complete drunkenness. "Public nuisance," he said helpfully.
"Yeah, a public nuisance, and he was right to shut 'em up. I woulda done the same thing... take Christmas away from 'em all if they can't celebrate it quietly and keep it to 'emselves... Namba, write that down, I want to remember it when I take over..."
As he pretended to write a memo, Namba nodded. "Of course," he said.

What they don't realize is that Ambrose Namba, nutty Namba, the mad doctor, has a secret talent. I could drink 'em under the table in college, and it seems I can to this day. Some kids get a house or a fortune as their inheritance. I got a high tolerance for alcohol. And that is a gift money can't buy.
But it can get you money.


Persian poked at his human with his paw. Nothing but more pointless rambling. His ears went straight up with excitement. The human was officially out of it. Now was his big chance to get out. Creeping close to the floor, he slipped under the human's desk and straight forward to the window, then crawled under the closed curtains onto the inner ledge. Balancing himself carefully, he felt around until one of the windows, which no one ever really bothered to have fixed, popped open slightly, not too much, but enough for a rather large cat Pokemon to easily slink in and out of. This was Persian's secret cat door, as it were, so secret not even his own human was aware of its existence. It provided him a frequent escape from an otherwise boring existence in the office.
"Do you... do ya feel a little draft, Sebastian?"
"Oh, it must be from the fireplace or something. This place is older than... older than that doctor over there, you know. I bet he gets drafts too..."
"Sebastian, there's a fire going there anyway... how can something that makes us warm make us cold at the same time? It's a pair... a para-... it contradicts itself."
Persian slowly, cautiously slipped through to the outside ledge and leapt onto a nearby tree branch, then navigated his way down the rest of the tree. Once there, he sniffed around, his tail and ears perking when he found the spot. He extended his claws and sunk them into the dirt, then began digging until he found his treasure. A collar, Sneasel sized, with a pink crystal heart charm dangling from it. The perfect present for a perfect Sneasel. He'd seen it at the department store not long ago shopping with the human, and managed to sneak it out of the store with no one noticing. Persian picked the collar up by the leather in his teeth, filled his hole back in, and climbed back up the tree to return to the window ledge, taking care to shake the snow off his fur before returning inside to lay down beside his human, hiding the collar under him, and obediently went to sleep as the fire roared nearby, purring as he dozed off.

 

[Nekusagi]

Wow, no reviews for chapter 3? Come on, you guys...

Anyway, I lied about there being "no epilogue". There IS an epilogue, and I'll post it later.

Also, I mention late in this chapter a phone call. I added that in after going through my past fanfiction and realizing that back in July, I wrote another set on December 23rd where Gio called Delia. I figured I'd work that in. If you'd like to read about the phone call, here's the link: http://community.livejournal.com/rocket100/42329.html#cutid1

Anyway, here's Chapter 4...


The sound of footsteps outside awoke Nekou from her slumber that morning.
"Ohhh..."
The door to her office opened slightly. "Knocking would be nice," Nekou said, peeved there were still people around who had yet to learn a little common courtesy.
"Sorry, miss," a voice from behind the door said. Nekou couldn't quite put her finger on the owner. It was one of the guys Hitoshi worked with. They hung out in packs most of the time, and tended to be quite nondescript, so she never bothered really to learn their names.
"You... work with Hitoshi, right? There's no need to be so formal, then. Oh, yeah, come on in," she said. "What is it?"
"Hitoshi wanted you to have this," he said, passing her a box. "He said you needed it or something."
There was a card taped to the front of the package. Nekou read it.
Nekou- You seemed a little down, so I felt like you needed this. I found this last night and knew you'd love it. DON'T TELL THE PROFESSOR.
Love,
Hitoshi
Nekou was puzzled. "Don't tell the professor? What?" Inside the box was a small ornament in the shape of a Skitty. It held a candy cane in its mouth and wore a red ribbon around its neck. "Aw, that's sweet of him... so he found this... last night?"
"That's what he told me," the visitor said.
"What day is it today?" Nekou asked.
"It's Christmas Eve. Doesn't that computer have a calendar on it?"
Nekou blushed at her sudden flash of ignorance. "Christmas Eve? As in, December 24th?"
"Yes. The party's tonight. Are you going?"
The party. With all the sleeping Nekou had done, she'd failed to get a bit of paperwork done for anyone. And more importantly, she'd slept overnight in her office. No wonder my dreams were so crazy. Sleeping down here would give anyone nightmares.
"Um..." Nekou knew there was no way she'd make it. Even with the pretty new dress she had in case such an occasion came up, self preservation trumped celebration any day. And the truth was, if Nekou valued her position right now, she'd have to keep people happy, at least now. That meant no Christmas party for her. "I can't make it. Tell him I'm sorry."
"Will do," he said, then winked. "You sure? Because you're a very pretty-"
"Does it look like I'll be able to do that?" Nekou asked. She glared a hole through him. "And what part of 'I'm Hitoshi's girlfriend' do you have a problem with?"
"Whoa, it was just a compliment, sheesh."
Nekou's gaze remained unmoved.
"I'm leaving," he said.
"Good," Nekou said, smilling sweetly now.

No, I'm not paranoid. He was totally trying to make a move on me. And just that another guy was making a move on me is very creepy. Like the Twilight Zone or something. Guys don't usually go for chicks like me that directly, do they?


"And if you're planning on getting some REALLY last minute shopping done today, watch those roads, because they've got ice something terrible around upper Cela-"
Sebastian whacked the snooze button on his clock radio, cutting off the obnoxious traffic reporter who'd so rudely awakened him from his slumber. His head felt like any time it would explode. "Mmmm... what time is it... it's too ungodly an hour..."
Nine forty five AM. He'd slept in an hour. His snooze alarm had been set to go off every five minutes. That meant he'd hit it... five times now. But no, he didn't have to go today, not at all, it was a nasty hangover, after all... His head hit the pillow again.
"Hey, how about this for a Christmas present, a diamond studded toilet seat, well, that's one of the items you can buy from-"
It was only Christmas Eve after all, not like anything of particular importance was happening today, who was going to say anything if he didn't show up?
"And here, with a holiday blast from the past, is that Burl Ives favorite, Silver and Gold..."
His eyes still closed, Sebastian grabbed the clock radio, yanked it up, cord and all, and flung it against a wall. The radio produced a satisfying crunch sound as it hit the floor. "That should shut you up." His nemesis defeated, Sebastian went back to finding another rationalization for nursing the aftereffects of the previous night... It wasn't like he was the only Team Rocket scientist, after all. It was almost a given Namba would show up. Namba could handle everything for today...
"Damn it!" Sebastian said, realizing in his absence, he was giving the doctor an unintentional early Christmas present. "This morning is not going to get any worse..." he muttered to himself, as his cell phone went off from its spot on his bookshelf. He scrambled for it, nearly tripping on a stray slipper. "I know, I'm coming," Sebastian answered the phone.
"I'm not worried about whether you'll make it or not, Sebastian. Believe me, if your headache's anything as bad as mine is... Have you heard anything at all from Namba?"
Sebastian held the phone away for a moment while he said a silent prayer to whatever was out there. The last thing he needed to hear from Giovanni this morning was "have you heard anything at all from Namba?"
"No, which is precisely why I even bothered getting out of bed. What's up?"
"He's missing. I checked in the lab, and one of them said he was going to the hardware store..."
"Then there's time. I think. There's no way we can get his assets frozen or anything, is there?" Hardware store. For some reason, Sebastian doubted Namba had plans to fix the leaky pipes...
"What?"
"Nothing... I'm getting ready right now. I'll be there soon."

From my apartment to there is approximately 2.5 miles. The current speed limit is 30 MPH... oh, what am I talking about? My car can't top 25 anyway... Stupid car, I hate you.


"So, did she like it?" Hitoshi, hands full with sketches and plans, did some final calculations. "The ornament?"
"She seemed happy enough," his friend replied. "I mean, she squealed..."
"She liked it, then," Hitoshi said. "Hey, Kev, could you pass me that hammer?"
Kev reached for the hammer and paused. "What about... you know? Procedure?"
"Procedure?" Hitoshi asked, feigning his ignorance. "What procedure? I'm building this just like Namba's plans say..."
"That's what I'm talking about. We're supposed to tell the Professor something's up, remember?"
"No, we aren't," Hitoshi said coolly. Kev's mouth dropped open.
"What? Hitoshi, what do you mean? It's been that way since Professor Sebastian got here... You know he doesn't like Namba's Christmas thing..."
"We aren't," Hitoshi said, "and that's just how it is. Look, last year, Namba paid someone off to get them to fess up to ratting him out. Apparently, this poor sucker also told him I've been the one giving the order to do so every year. And he told me yesterday there'd be repercussions if I tried undermining him again. Or something like that. So no. We aren't. Because I said so. We're just going to be good little assistants and do our jobs."
"Hitoshi, it doesn't work... the way he said. The Professor wants us to do this... there's no way you can get in trouble, he can override anything Namba says." Kev had never seen Hitoshi like this. To have Hitoshi this set in his ways, Namba must have given him quite the ultimatum.
"And at the same time, we can't get in trouble for NOT following the Professor's wishes, because I'm simply following orders from Namba. As soon as he learns Namba threatened me, he can tell Namba off and we all win."
"Couldn't he just get you off the hook if someone told and the crazy old man found out?"
"Kev." Hitoshi said. "It's a catch 22 here. And I'm going to err on the side of Namba today. Professor Sebastian didn't threaten me. Namba did. I think it's clear where I'm better off. Now help me with this thing. The doc says if we get this built in time we can go to the party tonight." He took the hammer out of Kev's hand and began banging two flats together.
"Oh, Hitoshi, about the party," Kev said, remembering his earlier encounter with Nekou.
"Yes? You're going, right?"
"Well, I'm planning on it," Kev said. "But Nekou... your girlfriend..." he said, remembering his earlier Misadventures in Sexual Harassment, "said she couldn't. She said she's got too much work. She wanted me to tell you."
"Too bad," Hitoshi said. "And she'd bought that new dress, and everything... Guess it's just us two guys tonight, then."

Kev is more upset than I am, I think. Everyone knows he's got a serious thing for her. I don't know why he bothers hiding it. Except, you know, she's dating me. And I understand completely. There's few things more awkward than admitting you have a thing for your friend's girlfriend. Or stupid. Back off, man.


Despite Nekou's wish she could stop time, evening quickly came, and she was still stuck in filing hell. Her head ached, her hands were covered in paper cuts, and she was pretty miserable overall. "Kali..." she said, reaching for her Sneasel. "It looks like it's the two of us this Christmas." Kali sniffed at her. Did she have food? Presents? "Yeah, I know. You want your boyfriend, don't you? Well, if Persian really wants to see you that much, he'll come down here and find you himself. He's never had trouble before..."

Cinderella had it easy. Her little friends did the work for her. Why can't Kali do any of that?

"Nekou!"
Nekou spun around in her chair. "For the love of God, can you learn to knock? Oh, Wendy. What's your problem? Other than THAT thing?"

And here comes the evil stepsister. Only, you know, she's not a stepsister. I don't think so, at least.

Nekou winced at Wendy's dress. It was skimpy, red, covered in sequins, and paired with black thigh-high stiletto boots. Overall, it was very tacky.
"I'm wearing it to the party," Wendy said. "I'm glad you like it."
Nekou shook her head. "Don't you feel the least bit bad for all the innocent disco balls who gave their lives just so you could wear that? Now, why are you bothering me?"
"I understand you've been given a lot of work to do. Of the wood pulp and ink variety."
"Brilliant observation, Wendy. Care to help out?"
Wendy stared at Nekou as though she'd been asked to jump off a bridge. "I just came down here to remind you I need it all by five PM. New Year's Eve. Merry Christmas, Nekou."
Nekou was ready to set Kali on Wendy. You didn't just walk in to Nekou's office, point out how much work she had, and not bother to offer a hand. But was physical harm really the answer? Nekou could think of no other way...
"You're an orphan, right? Everyone's nice to orphans at Christmas."
"Wendy! Wait!" Nekou said, as Wendy walked out the door, calling off the Sneasel with one hand.
"What is it now?"
"I'm an orphan, Wendy..." Nekou whined.
"I'm terribly sorry about that," Wendy said, sarcastically.
"I'm an orphan... everyone's nice to orphans at Christmas, right? Tiny Tim was an orphan..."
"He was? I thought he was crippled."
"Maybe not," Nekou said, "but still... you wouldn't be mean to an orphan at Christmas, would you?"
"Um..." Wendy thought. "No?"
"That's right. Because everyone's nice to orphans at Christmas. So you're going to be nice to me, aren't you?"
There was something about Nekou... something Wendy couldn't resist, even though she knew she probably should. "Yes?"
"That's great, Wendy!" Nekou said, and scooped up the entire, unfinished pile from her desk. She walked up to Wendy, got very close, and grinned. "Christmas is a time of giving. So I'm going to give you all this!" Nekou pressed the stack into Wendy's arms, and hugged her.
"Nekou... what is this?"
"You're going to do all these for me... because I'm an orphan!"
Wendy stood with a horrified look on her face, silently mouthing curses.
"No need to thank me, Wendy!" Nekou said. "I know exactly how you feel! Now off you go!" She began guiding Wendy to the door. Completely resigned, Wendy walked out, her arms full and plans for the evening ruined, though she did manage to get one hand free to give Nekou her own gesture of goodwill to men.
"God bless us, every one!" Nekou called to Wendy, unfazed by her insult.


"Maybe he's in bed," Sebastian said. Nine o' clock and still nothing had been heard from Namba. "I mean, he drank at least as much as we did last night. Maybe more."
"He was the one who suggested we finish all the rum," Giovanni said helpfully. "He was right. It'd be a shame to let all that good liquor go to waste..."
"Agreed," Sebastian said. "The last thing we need is a bottle of rum gone- Oh, no."
"What? We finished it."
"Rum doesn't go bad, Giovanni," Sebastian explained. "They age the really good kind in barrels. It's like wine. Sitting around can only make it get better."
They both looked at each other in disgust that Namba had tricked them.
"You mean..."
"It's not really our fault. The eggnog last night must have put us in a highly suggestible state. Namba telling us the rum would go bad made perfect sense to us at the time." Sebastian was blushing. It wasn't often someone could pull the wool over his eyes. "The old coot must have some fantastic tolerance to be able to think that clearly."
"So it's unlikely he got a hangover," Giovanni finished, drawing the most logical conclusion.
"At least not as bad as ours," Sebastian said. "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice... I'm not going to let that happen, not tonight, of all nights. Even with most of the department tied up last night decorating... he could just as easily had them throw something together this morning. Namba's a whackjob, no question, but he's also extremely efficient, which is why I put up with him more than I should. And crazy like a Vulpix, for that matter. We've been had. I'd better head down there to put a stop to... whatever it is he's doing." Sebastian shuddered. "Before someone gets hurt. Like him."

With that moratorium I put on explosives for this month, his possibilities are extremely limited. Which is what worries me most.


Nekou took a final glance in the mirror before heading up to the party and smudged up her eyeliner a bit. The outfit had ended up cuter on her than it looked when she tried it on at the store. A knee-length burgundy dress, trimmed with lots of ribbon and lace, with a cute matching capelet, candy cane striped stockings worn with some Mary Janes... she looked like a doll, ready to be left under some lucky little girl's Christmas tree. Which was exactly the effect she was going for, in fact. "It's missing something," she said, then reached over to her desk, where she'd been wrapping presents a few minutes ago. "There," she said, tying her pigtails with some of the leftover ribbon and jingle bells. The one remaining she tied around her neck, a quick choker that nicely finished the look. Nekou was frequently mistaken for a male when wearing her uniform- which she often took advantage of- but with enough lace and ribbon, she could look extremely girly. "Let's go, Kali," she said, picking the Sneasel up and fluffing her petticoat.
Hitoshi was going to be pleasantly surprised this evening.


"No, no, you idiot, read the instructions!" Namba slammed his hand on the table as final preparations were made for his festivities. "Come on. We've only got so much time until his sleigh shows up... do you want to get paid or not? Because unless we get the fat man in the red suit-"
"Having fun?" Namba turned his head upon hearing the familiar voice.
"How'd you know?" Namba said. He was flabbergasted. Sebastian wasn't supposed to find out this year... "That insolent boy Hitoshi told you, didn't he?"
"I don't know what you're talking about, Namba. No, I did a little detective work. And I'll hand it to you, that was clever, getting both of us drunk and planning all this behind our backs. Maybe if you applied that same kind of craftiness to the job you're actually paid to do, there'd be more getting accomplished. So, what genius plan to kill Santa am I about to bring an end to this year?"
"For your information, Professor, I'm doing nothing wrong this year," Namba said defensively. "The agreement we came to last year was 'no more blowing up Claus'."
"And how is this year's scheme any different than that of past Christmases?" Sebastian asked.
"I'm going to capture him this year and bring him in for questioning. Flying Stantler, Professor! Imagine the possibilities!" Namba beamed.
Sebastian couldn't believe what he was hearing. "I've come to two conclusions, Namba," he said.
"That I'm impressively clever and I deserve a promotion this very minute?" Namba asked hopefully.
"No. That you're incredibly touched in the head and that I'm never again taking you with me to see a Tim Burton movie."

Going to Nightmare Before Christmas 3D seemed like a good enough idea at the time... Guess I was wrong. Again.

"So I can follow through with the plan, Professor?" Namba said, apparently missing Sebastian's point.
"Oh, yes, and then we can focus on the REALLY important missions. You know, the tooth fairy and the Easter Lopunny! And maybe the Great Pumpkin! Does that sound good to you?"
"You mean it, Professor?" Namba's eyes were now gleaming with anticipation.
Sebastian was not a happy professor. "That was sarcasm, Namba. So the answer is a resounding NO. I refuse to let you constantly waste our budget on your stupid plans every year. You're going to send everyone down here to the party, and you're going to do it now."
"I can't do that, Professor."
"And why not?"
"I promised to pay them for their work tonight," Namba said.
"Oh, you did? That changes everything," Sebastian replied.
"So I can finish?" Namba asked him.
"No," Sebastian said. "You're going to pay them anyway and let them go to the party."
Namba was aghast. "Professor..."
"Stick to your word, Namba. I think they gave you enough of your time," he said, as several assistants filed happily past him, snickering amongst themselves about the doctor's predicament. "Oh, and Ambrose? I expect to see you up there as well," he finished. "I think the stress of the job is getting to you. You need to take a little break. Have some... fun."
Namba opened his mouth in protest. "Professor Sebastian..."
"I know, I know, I'm too kind, aren't I? I mean it," he hissed, leaving. Namba looked at the now vacant laboratory and the remnants of his aborted project.
"You got lucky this time, Kringle," he said under his breath. "Next year, I promise.Then we'll see how jolly you are..."


"Hitoshi, there's no reason to feel so bummed. So Nekou didn't make it. You're acting like she just ditched you or something."
"That's not the problem, Kev. This is the first Christmas we're going to be apart," Hitoshi said. "She's like a Christmas tradition for me now, or something... I taught her what Christmas was! I gave her all those specials to watch and everything."
"Oh, I see your problem," Kev said. "You've got Guilty Boyfriend Syndrome, haven't you?"
"What?" Hitoshi asked.
"You think she's going to forget Christmas entirely if you spend it apart one whole year," Kev explained. "Look, I know she had amnesia and all, but that kind of thing only happens once. It's not like she's going to just forget everything again."
"Who's going to forget everything again?"
The two jumped. "Nekou?" Hitoshi asked. "I thought you had that-"
"It's taken care of," Nekou said.
"But... how?"
"Christmas is a time of giving," she replied. "And I gave. Let's leave it at that, shall we?"

Kali watched as the human struck up conversation with her mate. She wasn't going to be paying much attention to the little Sneasel, then... Kali wandered about. Her nose picked up the familiar scent, she knew he was here somewhere... Then they could escape to their special place. She held the scarf tightly, awaiting the moment she could give it away... Red eyes met, and they knew they had found each other.
"<Sneasel?>"
"<Oh, there you are! What's the human doing?>"
"<Talking. And yours?">
"<The same.>"
"Mrow," Persian said. That was all it meant, an expression of happiness. Kali followed behind Persian as the two slunk through the crowd.

"Well, that ended painlessly enough," Sebastian said. "What's wrong with you? Namba's been taken care of, I saw to it."
"This isn't about Namba," Giovanni said. Something was clearly bothering him. "I called her yesterday..."
Sebastian knew instantly what he was talking about. "Oh," he said. "It must have been hard. What'd she say to you?"
"No, it wasn't a bad thing. She was almost happy to talk to me. But then I said I... wanted to... never mind," he said. "I worry about the boy sometimes, that's all. Maybe I worried too much about him yesterday."
"You know you'll have your chance," Sebastian said. He didn't know much about the situation, preferring to stay a safe distance from it, but the pain in Giovanni's voice was unmistakable. "Think of how happy you'll both be when you do get to see him."
"Maybe, Sebastian. Maybe you're right..."
"What'd I miss?" Namba appeared seemingly out of nowhere. "I'm here, Professor," he said, waving his hands and trying to get Sebastian's attention.
"Oh, look at that," Sebastian said sarcastically. "Namba's here." He drew close to Namba. "And you're going to stay here, aren't you? Where I can see you."
Namba grumbled something that sounded like "yes, Professor."
"Good," Sebastian said, quite pleased with himself.


Nekou and Hitoshi had been dancing close. "Nekou... you realize this is the first time I've ever done this with you."
"Yes," Nekou said. "What's your point?"
"So you've done this before?" Hitoshi said, feeling slightly paranoid.
"Nah, I'm just making it up as I go," Nekou replied. "Hey, thanks for that Skitty ornament."
"You're welcome," Hitoshi said. "I thought it'd brighten your day."
"Yeah. What did that note mean, anyway?"
"What note?"
"The 'don't tell the Professor' thing at the end," Nekou said.
Hitoshi became very nervous. "Oh, yeah, that. Well, we had a big pile of Professor Sebastian's old Christmas stuff to trim the tree with, and, well..."
"Hitoshi-!" Nekou said, shocked. Had he actually-
"Yeah," Hitoshi said. "I doubt he'll miss it, though. How much could a guy like him like Skitty, anyway?"
Nekou smiled at him. "It's fine," she said. "Really. It's just not much like... you... to go and do something like that, I guess. Me... I'd do it any day."
Hitoshi was now the shocked one. "But Nekou... he..."
"Yeah," she replied. "He did. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't be my typical klepto self."
"You're a piece of work, you know," he said. "Hey. Where's the Sneasel?'
"Hm?" Nekou said. "I brought her up here..." She looked down, and Kali was gone. "Oh. I think we both know where she is," she muttered.
"Shouldn't you go find her then?" Hitoshi asked.
"Nah," Nekou said. "It's Christmas. I'm not going to be totally heartless. They couldn't have gone too far. Besides, Kali will come back when she gets hungry. I'm sure her boyfriend's no different." She smiled at HItoshi. "Mistletoe," she said, smooching him.
"Huh?" Hitoshi said. He blushed. "Where? I don't see any."
"I lied," Nekou said, hugging him. "And that's your Christmas present this year."
"It is?" Hitoshi asked.
"I'm kidding," Nekou said. "What, a kiss not good enough for you?'

Wait- THIS is the ending our story gets? I thought we agreed, no lessons... what is this, some kind of chick flick? Hey, Neku, don't stop typ-


And in the middle of all this, on the roof, under the full moon over Viridian City, a Sneasel and a Persian sat in the snow, exchanging presents, something they had learned from their respective humans. They were completely unaware of the reason, but the two had simply assumed this is what's done at this time of year.
"<My human made this.>"
"<For me?>"
"<No, for her mate. But she forgot about it, so...>"
"<It's lovely.>"
"<You wear it around your neck. Like a collar.>"
"<Oh, one of those things. Yeah, I have another one. My human makes me wear it when I go out with him.>"
Kali threw the scarf over Persian's neck. Persian purred happily at the warmth of the yarn. "<This is for you,>" he meowed. He dropped the leather collar still in his mouth. "<It might be a bit chewed on from carrying it... I'm sorry if it is.>"
Kali slipped into the collar feet first, then tightened it around her neck. "<It's so pretty,>" she said.
And under the full moon, the two curled up, keeping each other warm as midnight brought Christmas Day and the bells chimed all over Kanto...

 

[Nando]

The sheer awesomeness of this eludes words. This is why Sebastian OWNS.

 

[Evil Raichu]

LOL! This rocks!! And that is an ADORABLE picture!

I would have reviewed sooner, but I hadn't realized you posted chapter 3.

Anyway, this is great. Loved the scene with Gio, Seb, Namba and the rum. I was like...wow. Namba surprised me there, with his manipulating. That was good.

One of my favorite parts was when Nekou got all hung up on the Kitty Kitty Sparkle calendar instead of realizing the real reason Christmas Future/Persian had brought her there. xD

 

[Nekusagi]

Yeah. I don't know WHERE the rum thing came from- I think I was watching the Chuck Christmas episode while writing Chapter 3, and there was a running joke about a very Nambaesque character spiking the rum at the company Christmas party, so I took the inspiration and ran with it.

I should probably also link to the fic about the anime (Kitty Kitty Sparkle, the apparent magical girl anime of choice in the Pokemon world. Think a mashup of Tokyo MewMew and Cardcaptor Sakura, with Skitty and Meowth catgirls). Wow, I reference a lot of my past fanon in this, don't I? Here it is, in case you're wondering why Nekou despises KKS so much: http://community.livejournal.com/rocket100/25991.html#cutid1

I'm going to wait till next week for the epilogue, probably a day or two after Christmas, because it's only a day since I posted Ch. 4, and I like spacing out my fanfiction chapters.

 

[Nekusagi]

And now... The epilogue.

Out of curiosity, and since I had a blast writing this, would you guys like to see more, non-holiday fanfiction involving Nekou just written for Bulbagarden (as opposed to using a R100 prompt)? Because if you'll read it, I'll (try to) write it.


Epilogue: Christmas Morning Again

Kali poked Nekou with a claw. "Sneasel. Snee snee sneasel. SNEASEL!"
"Huh.. what... I'm up, Kali," Nekou said, rolling over. "You can stop poking me now..." She looked for her glasses on her nightstand and her eyes stopped at the crystal heart charm on Kali's new collar, a detail she'd been too tired to notice upon the Sneasel's return the night before. "Kali... what is that? Where did you get it?"
Kali looked up innocently at her and began whimpering.
"Oh, I see. Persian's your sugar daddy now, is that it? High roller, huh?"
Kali waved a claw threateningly, having taken offense to Nekou's comments. "I'm kidding, Kali. Seriously. You two snuggle all you want, so long as either of us don't know about it." She glanced at her watch. Hitoshi was late.
"Gaaah, Hitoshi. I thought we'd agreed on a time.." Hitoshi. Nekou was still wearing her nightgown. "Oh, crap. He can't see me like this! I'll never live it down..." Nekou searched her closet for something a little more normal- a sweater and a black skirt- and threw it on, then tied her hair back in a single low ponytail. "Cocoa," she realized, as she heard a knock on her door. "Kali, go get the door," she said, as she scooped cocoa mix out of the can into mugs. Kali pried the door open from the bottom with her claws. "I'm sorry I'm late, Nekou... the cab hit traffic. You wouldn't believe the fares people charge these days to Cerulean..."
Nekou stood in the doorway, staring at Hitoshi. "Oh, no, I only pay them almost every day to get home," she said, a little annoyed. "Here, have some cocoa," she said.
"This isn't stirred," Hitoshi said. "Nekou, you didn't have to rush like this for me." He mixed the cocoa into the hot water with his finger.
"Yes I did. It's Christmas and everything has to be perfect..." Nekou gave HItoshi a wrapped box. "For you," she said.
"You worry too much, Nekou... All right!" Hitoshi's eyes lit up as he saw the DVD boxset Nekou gave him. "Too bad I won't have time to watch them," he said.
"It's the thought that counts, right? Besides, you could just try to wipe out the whole thing today, if you really wanted to. I won't mind. So, did you bring me anything?"
Hitoshi searched for the right words. "Um.. technically speaking, it's back at headquarters."
"What?"
"Some old computers got thrown out not long ago. I managed to salvage the extra RAM from one of the laptops. I can install it next week in yours if you need it. Didn't you say one of your programs was a resource hog, or something?"
"Oh, Hitoshi, you remembered. You're not as dumb as you let on, you know." She sipped from her cocoa. "Anyway, enjoy it. That's pretty much my entire November paycheck there- Hitoshi?"
"That thing on Kali's neck..." he said, staring at the charm.
"Yeah, it probably cost more than it does for me to feed her for a month," Nekou said. "Let's not worry about how it got there, shall we?"

Sebastian looked over the rows of ornaments he'd taken off the trees. It was nowhere to be found.
"How? But... why?" He couldn't believe it. "The Skitty... gone? And it was my favorite one..." He scooped them off his apartment floor and back into their cardboard box. "Wherever you are, Skitty, I hope you've got a good home now," he said, sadly.

Persian opened his eyes as the first beams of Christmas sunlight fell over him. He rolled over on his human's bed, watching for any signs of life...
"Mrr... for me, Santa? I got the train set, mommy..."
Still asleep. That was fine with the cat. He reached a claw under the bed and pulled out the scarf where he'd hidden it, nuzzling it. Kali's scent was still strong on it. Persian rolled on the scarf, wrapping it around his neck, and hopped back onto the bed, snuggling next to the human. A little more sleep would be good for him this morning, as well... His eyes closed and he drifted into his own Christmas dreams, as church bells rang out. The bright sun hung like a glass ball in the clear blue sky, reflecting off the snowy ground and spreading its warmth. Today would be a very good day.