This actually happened.

[evkl]

To me. With only a very minor degree of satire added. This was my school today. Names have been changed. Here's the idea; we have a 30-minute period in the middle of the day where we can do club activities, or, on mondays, SSR. Let's see how that SSR turned out in my class today (Greg is almost word-for-word in class; he's not fake.) I observed this, and it's been transcribed by me.

Mrs. Smith: Okay, class, today is your mandatory SSR day. You have to read an outside book for pleasure.
John: So we can’t read a textbook.
Mrs. Smith: Nope. That’s not really allowed.
John: How about an English novel that needs read?
Mrs. Smith: That’s not really allowed either. You see, this is required pleasure reading.
Tom: But doesn’t required pleasure reading sort of contradict itself?
Mrs. Smith: No, the idea is that kids should read books NOT required for school.
Greg: Fuck this, I don’t wanna read.
John: I’m just going to do my homework.
Mrs. Smith: John, you can’t do that.
John: Yes, I can. How are you going to stop me from doing homework?
Mrs. Smith: John, if you don’t do outside reading, I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you a detention.
Tom: A detention for doing his homework?
Mrs. Smith: Yes, that would have to be the case in the event that he doesn’t do his required free outside independant reading.
Greg: I fucking hate this shit. Fuck I-Block. Fuck P-W.
Mrs. Smith: Now, now, Greg, I’m sure I have an interesting book on differential calculus or psychology for you.
Greg: Fuck calculus. Fuck Psychology.
Mrs. Smith: John, don’t do homework now. I’m serious, I will have to give you a detention. Oh, by the way, I’m keeping a reading log.
Tom: A reading log?
Mrs. Smith: Yes, a reading log. Every Monday I’m going to go around and check on what you’re reading, and your progress.
Tom: You can’t be serious. This is utterly rediculous. This is like 1930’s Germany has invaded P-W. It’s like the SS is coming door to door.
Mrs. Smith: Tom, I’m very serious—John, stop doing your homework! Stop being productive!
John: I’m an AP student and I’m not allowed to do my homework in a study period?
Mrs. Smith: Yes, exactly my point! I’m glad you get it. As I was saying, we’re going to be tracking your reading. Plus, I’m required to conference with you guys. Four times a marking period.
Tom: That’s eight times a semester. Sixteen times a year. That’s absurd. What happens if we don’t do these conferences?
Mrs. Smith: I’m afraid that’ll cause a detention too. You see, this hinderance is critical to the process of making reading fun.
Tom: This is torture on a scale not encountered since the Spanish Inquisition. What are you thinking?
Mrs. Smith: Now, now, class. Get to reading, I’ll start checking your books now. Make sure you have a book out for your recreational required reading.
Greg: Fuck this reading shit. I hate this. Hell, I can’t even read, I never learned this shit.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

Holy shit. I'd say the teacher, in all seriousness, should give him a preschooler book.

 

[Strawberry Delcatty]

After reading that, I just became completely speechless...

 

[TRF-chan]

...

WTF? ><

As if I needed more of a reminder of why I despise many people in my age group.

 

[Kasumi]

Seriously...

What the Fuck? O_O;

 

[Minty Electronica]

Thus, another example of the modern educational system's attempts to institutionalize today's youth, to crush free thought and will, and to develop a society of hard-working citizens who simply nod and pretend they're listening.

By the way, I loved the "Stop being productive!" line. That's an effing gem right there.

Edit: Sorry if I misunderstood the purpose of the SSR, as I don't have to put up with that in my school. I'm just saying that, yes, "forced reading for pleasure" is a self-contradiction... unless you're a sadist forcing the reading on someone else. Then I say, "Whatever floats your boat."

 

[Barb]

So, getting detention for doing your homework during SSR is somehow supposed to make reading fun? Apparently Earth logic doesn't apply here.

 

[Murgatroyd]

This ranks right up there with the times various English teachers tried to get me to stop reading the assigned books. (I had a bad habit of reading an entire book in the time it took other students to read a single chapter, which really screwed up the "what do you think happens next" discussions.)

 

[evkl]

The "Stop being productive" was a line added for sarcastic benefit, when in reality it was a reiteration of the "don't do your homework," which is equally baffling when coming from a teacher. Yeah. My school sucks some major dick.

 

[GrnMarvl14]

I remember going through something like that when I was in high school. Only my teacher didn't give half a flip. So we had a similar conversation between my friend and the teacher, and it ended with me continuining to read (as I'd been doing) and my friend doing his homework. Ironically for the class that my friend had with that teacher I never saw why anyone made a big deal out of it. But I was always just an instigator back then.

 

[Dark Espeon]

*stares in blank at the screen* O_O;;

Mrs. Smith: John, if you don’t do outside reading, I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you a detention.

"Screw you bitch, I'm not reading it." *storms out of the classroom* :-D

We never had such thing as detentions in Cuba >>. God, North America is just bizarre >_<. People drive everywhere, eat food made of grease, and the school system is two years behind ours .

But that's besides the point =P.

 

[Barb]

We had something similar to SSR when I was a junior in high school (1986). We were given copies of Reader's Digest to peruse.

I had a bad habit of reading an entire book in the time it took other students to read a single chapter, which really screwed up the "what do you think happens next" discussions.

I had this same habit. My popularity soared the day the teacher gave the test on the book the class was to have read.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

I did the same thing. Actually, one time, I'd already read the book in question, so I sat there writing fanfics in class the entire time and still pulled an A.

 

[Argy]

Same thing with me in 11th grade English. We had to read Jurassic Park (I have no idea why), and since I had already read it and had been utterly obsessed with the franchise when I was in grade school, I read through it again quickly as a review and aced everything.

But this thread makes me so glad to be out of high school.

 

[Barb]

But this thread makes me so glad to be out of high school.

Ditto.

 

[fruitsmoothierevenge]

We didn't have anything like this in high school, we had it in middle school... ;;

 

[Zhen Lin]

Pah, I wish my required reading was that interesting to read voluntarily. Though, apparently, my last literature text [preferably last literature text ever] is quite interesting, according to a few people...

 

[Archaic]

We had something similar to this in English back in the first few grades of high school. Didn't really bother me much, mainly because I was pretty much doing this already in most other classes (It wasn't until grade 10 that I actually bothered listening to what we were being taught in class, beyond finding the dates and content of our assessment). Unfortunatly, I started to get heat from teachers who had trouble believing that I could have possibily read every book in my reading log. I place the full blame on them for my no longer being able to go through a 300 page book in 30 minutes.

 

[Mew Jadester]

I will do for 2 weeks only i think with 4 books and will review 1 book to the class. Im planning on doing for Pokemon Special Manga Volumes.... haahah

 

[Trip]

Wow, sounds like a real genius right there.

They're doing something like this this year. For the first 12 minutes of class each day, we're supposed to read. Since they're rotating it by class period and I don't actually get to the high school until 3rd period (out of 4 per day), yesterday was the first day. Mr. Noel said "today we start reading. Emphasis on the reading part."

I wrote.

- Trip