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Life of a Pokémon: The Agony of Battles and What a Trainer is Worth

I skimmed the first chapter and I hate to say the one thing that sticks out in my mind the most is how ...short... your writing style is. It's strange to see only 300-400 words per chapter (esp. compared to my own writing style; any one of my chapters is longer than your entire story so far!). The biggest thing you learn as you develop and improve your writing skills is how to 'slow down' and take time to paint better visual pictures of what's happening in the story. The Mona Lisa wasn't painted in five minutes.... ;)

(For a simple exercise, pick at an everyday object and try to describe everything -- and I do mean absolutely every last detail -- about it, using not less than 1,000 words. Sound difficult? Yeah, but like learning to ride a bicycle, the more you try the easier it gets.)

Oh, and on a technical note you should double space between paragraphs. Having a little visual padding separating them really does make it easier on the reader's eyes because they're not looking at a densely packed "wall of text".

And I have to apologize that I don't have much to say about plot or premise here.
 
I'm busy with a puppy who just came into the house yesterday and etc. I have things to do, and I'm just glad I have time to post here....
 
(Yeah, but that's life -- everyone has busy days, you just deal with it.

(PS: That is going to be all from me.)
 
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Chapter 8-Gym Battle Number Eight! *
I looked down towards the ground as Love-Dove took Aqua, Eevee, and I to Opelucid City, the site of our eighth and final gym battle. While I was thinking, however, Eevee nipped at me. I smiled and gave a playful nip back. Aqua and I had decided to call my young child Aurora and to evolve her into the majestic Glaceon. I knew this would help with our battle against several trainers, although I wasn't sure who yet. Then I spotted it, a rustic city with old-looking people and vines growing on the old houses that were starting to crumble. It was almost unbelievable such an old-feeling place could be the site of the team's eighth and final gym battle!

We landed on the ground just minutes later. I spotted a suprisingly new-looking Pokémon Center and pointed with my front paw. Aqua laughed and agreed to take us all to the Pokémon Center first. I tapped my Pokéball, was pulled inside while I felt as if I was water evaporating, being lifted from the ground and re-used, and Aqua talked to Nurse Joy. She smiled and took all of Aqua's Pokéballs (and Aurora) and put us on a flat machine. Seconds later I felt any wounds alleviate, my moves regain strength, and every powerful status condition gone. Aqua then reelased me from my Pokéball, and I pushed her onto my back with my tail and carried her all the way to the Opelucid Gym.

We entered the building only to find two dragons and multiple floors to navigate. At the very top, I could see a girl who Aqua called Iris looking down on us. It unnerved me a bit to be looked at like that from so far above. I looked at the maze, then at the trainers. This seemed almost impossible. I sighed and scanned the area. I had found a way, if everything worked out. I zigged and I zagged, going back and forth fighting many different trainers on the way. I started to pant after several floors of fighting. Aqua pulled out a Max Potion and healed me. It stung, but it truly worked. We were at the top. Now we had to face Iris.

Iris smiled, impressed by the fact we had made it all the way up here. Apparently she didn't get many challengers in here. She was curious to see what Pokémon Aqua had, and I showed myself and sprayed a Hydro Pump at the floor. Iris nodded, excited, and sent out a Fraxure. It growled and showed off with Dragon Tail. The battle had begun. I attacked back with Blizzard, which instantly knocked out Iris's Fraxure. That was fun. I eagerly awaited Iris's next Pokémon, but Aqua decided to switch me out for Shoe. Shoe showed off a few punches and kicks before tightening its belt. I watched Iris send out a Druddigon from a Pokéball. She would be a fierce opponent, and I knew it. I cheered from my Pokéball, smiling as Shoe tried to intimidate Druddigon. It didn't do a thing to her! I watched as Shoe hit Druddigon with a strong Close Combat and Druddigon used revenge, severely injuring Shoe. I cried out for Shoe and sighed when he stood up. However, in seconds, he fell over.
Aqua then decided to send out Love-Dove. I complained, knowing I could KO Druddigon with one hit. However, Love-Dove soon finished off Druddigon with a quick blast of Razor Wind. Now it made sense why Aqua sent her out. Aqua nodded with happiness and told Love-Dove to return. I felt my Pokéball being lifted, and I soon popped onto the battlefield as Iris sent out her Haxorus. I gave a smug look and blasted Haxorus with Blizzard. It hurt Haxorus, but it was fine! Haxorus then pummeled me with a strong Dragon Tail causing me to switch. Bacon was then switched in. He took a strong Slash, and hit back with a Flare Blitz, causing Haxorus considerable damage and giving it a burn. They both then launched their powerful attacks at eachother, Haxorus using Assurance and Bacon using Arm Thrust. Then, it was a standoff. Bacon faltered, but caught himself right before Haxorus fell to the ground.

Iris then awarded us the Legend Badge and congratulated us on winning all eight badges. I smiled at Aqua and jumped on her shoulders, causing her to laugh, ending the gym battles of our journey. However, there were much tougher battles to come....
 
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Hello, dear readers of this fanfiction! I'd just like to say that firstly, my character Aqua is running for best supporting character, so any chapters that seem the best to read if you're looking for a quick way to get the gist of Aqua will have an asterik next to them. Happy reading!

~Eeveewithwings123
 
*Sigh* Why is Arceus against me? Is ONE vote too much to ask for? Or a reply at least? This fanfic is hitting rock bottom, I swear. I'm leaving this fanfic soon if I don't get much action and will be moving on to my next BIG fan fiction I'm sure you guys WILL enjoy- Chuchu and Expo. I just want to do a tally. If I get 5 positive replies, I will carry on with this fic! If not, well, see you guys in Chuchu and Expo. *Poll closes next Tuesday at 8:00 PM*


EDIT: NVM I am going on!!
 
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It saddens me to say this greatly but as my long hiatus has shown I really don't have the time on my plate to finish this fan fiction. I dearly apologize to the readers (who probably already forgot about this fiction :( )
 
Please note: The thread is from 11 years ago.
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